Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for October 26, 2019

Jesus Christ! What were you thinking?!

Get some loaves, he’s got the fishes.

Oh well, break out the breadsticks.

Maybe He can resurrect them.

In vino veritas, in aqua sanitas.

They got drunk and forgot to breathe.

God what an ungrateful job this is. You try to do a nice miracle for someone and all they do is wine.

I’ve heard of drinking like a fish, but this is ridiculous.

Grasshopper, you have much to learn…hiccup

Perhaps a variation of Steven Wright’s “stop turning the water into wine, I’m trying to take a shower.” :p

Who’s the guy with the beard on the left? It was mother Mary who guilted him into the first miracle in Cana. . .

Make the fish tasty though.. Maybe, that was the inspiration for German rollmops.

Ooooops!

Red wine and fish. What a philistine.

Gillogical : > ]

Jeez. How embarrassing.

♩i’m goin’, i’m goin’ where the water tastes like wine…

I always chuckled about mothers telling their kids to behave !

F’sure the kids in my family (all generations) behaved. Often loudly, often with physical contact, and not unusually in a manner that seemed designed  to attract negative attention from bystanders.

My own system was to have three absolute requirements:

1: When you are on pavement  you will  be holding an adult hand (or be in a chain of kids attached to an adult on one end). “Pavement” is any paved surface that a car or truck might drive on. Swat offense if you wiggle out and hare off, and quite possibly the end of the adventure.

2: If called by name (“Suzie!”) or category (“kids!”), you must answer  immediately, clearly; giving your location. You must in addition stay within sight of your adult. If you don’t, then the adventure is over right now.

3: The one word “STOP” must be immediately obeyed.

Well okay, 4: The one word “HUSH” was an indication of something worth hearing or sneaking up on (an owl, a fawn, a snake, etc.) It wasn’t a rule, but the kids all figured it out very quickly. Occasionally, I also used it to just lower the noise level, but I was conscientious about not overusing it for that.

… and no others. Kids can internalize 3 things. Of course, there were a lot of other requirements but they were always discussable.

One of the interesting things: I only had to remind kid-friends once about the family rules, then the ones who already knew them would enforce them on the others. Another: My wife, who never understood what I was doing, had a lot of trouble enforcing her ever-changing, ever-growing set of rules, often used “Behave!”… and ended up quite frustrated. I never had a problem (well, not a large  problem).

But, it’s REALLY GOOD wine!

RED WINE with fish?! Next thing you know He’ll be serving ketchup on hot dogs.

Hope the fish are both named Lazarus…