Close to Home by John McPherson for January 11, 2020

That does save time. Never have to look for the thermometer it’s right there in the kids heads.

That is so wrong on so many levels, but Bleeb seems to like it. What the heck, he’s an alien! Good thing he’s friendly. ;-)

Looks like he’s already found a way to monkey with it — his temp’s actually a normal 98.6.

Until it reads 66.6

And Bleeb’s amazed…

The kid appears to have a bit of a fever. I think my Mom had a thermometer implanted in her hand. She could put her hand on my forehead and tell I had a fever with uncanny accuracy.

The fever disappears once Mom comes back with the rectal thermometer.

Next stop, the orthodontist.

There is probably a tracking device in there……..also very helpful.

Kid looks pretty large for a high-chair…

Bleeb’s New Year workout program must be working. Bleeb isn’t as round as he once was.

Well it would sure cut down on food poisoning. Personally, I’d like one for hot pizzas so I don’t melt the roof of my mouth!

The temperature read out may be on his head, but we all know where the thermometer is REALLY “implanted”…

The normal temperature is dropping…

We are Borg. Resistance is futile.

I asked my Doc how I was doing, he replied, “Not very well. Mercury is in Uranus.” I told him I am NOT into that stargazing mumbo-jumbo. Then he corrected himself, " I meant to say Patsnozzle, I’ve just broken my thermometer!" :>)

Closer and closer to robotic control!

Is Bleeb flipping us off? Hello, comic censors…