Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for April 25, 2020

PUDDING FIGHT …! Parasols en garde …!

(should be over easy)

I suspect she may prefer strawberry fondant on her pudding.

You’re pudding me on, aren’t you?

Mix by over whiskering my kittens egg pudding.

Make a wisk…

Hmm, looks like we’ll be having blood pudding instead of plum pudding tonight….

First soldier: “Pass me the chocolate pudding, would you?”

Second soldier: “No way, Jose!”

First soldier: “Whyever not?”

Second soldier: “It’s against regulations to help another soldier to dessert!”

.

Military grade joke number 48,576

I love how we confuse foreigners by calling so many of our foods puddings.

Yorkshire pudding, Christmas pudding, black pudding.

They can’t tell if they’re biting into a delicious sweet dessert, or a lump of congealed animal blood.

Submitted by: giorgiss

Stop your fussin! Just put a dollop of whipped cream on my pudding and I’ll be good to go!!

More of a custard, really. Now, if you want to talk tapioca, then there’s a whole tundra in which to traipse.

Oh, I want to burst into song over today’s model’s couture. … But Easter’s over, isn’t it?

(un)share and (un)share alike

…the fact that we have been in splendid isolation for so long has nothing to do with me thinking this looks like my uncle Ted…

…a little curvier than Ives…

… but he fought in world war two…

… was a paratrooper…

…his umbrella only partially opened…

…and he landed on another guy’s shoot…

…they called him Mary Poppins after that…

…it was an USO skit…

…‘course it wasn’t called USO back then…it was the United Service Organization…

…he kissed Bob Hope…

…well, she said she was Bob Hope…

…but uncle Ted suspected that it was really Lauren Bacall before it happened…

…he gave her her famous line…

…are you saluting me…

…or just happy to Seabee…

Nope. Alone puddings are begging for over-egging. Prepare.

Come TogetherThe BeatlesHere come old flat topHe come groovin’ up slowlyHe got joo joo eyeballsHe one holy rollerHe got hair down to his kneeGot to be a jokerHe just do what he pleaseHe wear no shoeshineHe got toe jam footballHe got monkey fingerHe shoot Coca-ColaHe say I know you, you know meOne thing I can tell you isYou got to be freeCome together, right nowOver meHe bad productionHe got walrus gumbootHe got Ono sideboardHe one spinal crackerHe got feet down below his kneeHold you in his armchairYou can feel his diseaseCome together, right nowOver meHe roller coasterHe got early warningHe got muddy waterHe one Mojo filterHe say one and one and one is threeGot to be good looking‘Cause he’s so hard to seeCome together right nowOver meCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahCome together, yeahFor non-commercial use only.

Or, as General Custard said at Little Egg Horn, “You gotta be yolking me!” But only Sitting Albumen was laughing.

I would not dream of dabbling in your pudding, as you put it, my dear!