That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 23, 2021

Natia had to go to all this trouble because her husband wouldn’t drink his coffee black.

Mary was zoning out on the job again, as she fantasized about last night with her boyfriend.

Abigail just realized that she was tricked and was not learning how to play the bagpipes.

“The cow is of the bovine ilk, one end gives moo, the other milk” Ogden Nash

School for blind dairymaids.

“Screw this, I ain’t gonna work on Maggie’s farm no more!”

It’s simple. Since all of the teats are higher up, that must be the low-fat milk.

“What’s that? I’m supposed to save the milk in bucket, not my lap?”

“If she tries to play ‘Turkey in the Straw’ again tonight, so help me, she’s going to find a hoof in her headscarf.”

practicing milking the situation for all it’s worth…

" I can’t remember … Is it squeeze-and-pull or pull-and-squeeze? "

After six months, Nancy was promoted from goats to cows, but it was hard to remember there were four gears, not just two.

No matter what the season/ be it blazin’ hot, or freezin’/ you will find Svetlana squeezin’/ for the very simple reason/ that she’s striving to appease/ people’s appetite for cheese.

Cow, thinking: “OMG – white socks with black dress shoes ! Don’t they teach these kids ANYthing ?”

And, of course, the cow was “out standing in her field !” (how did you overlook that one, Strob ?) =)

Now if I had 4 hands AND a bucket, I might win a blue ribbon at 4H.

Do I pull this one or de udder?

Chocolate cow…..chocolate milk!

Our latest modern miracle: A cow with horizontal teats—four in a row—specially bred for high efficiency milking.

That cow is not amoosed.

Mary took one more peek to make sure she wasn’t trying to milk the bull this time..

It’s a tedious line of work/ but it does have one precious perk/ you’re away from the barn/ where all those gosh darn/ titty-squeezers are known to lurk..

Margarita was going to work her way up the corporate ladder. She knew that with hard work, she could make something of herself. One day, she would be in charge of this farm.

“Why on earth do you want to look at my hands, Dr. Jenner?”

I have it on good authority of a county fair demonstrator that it’s pasteurized, homogenized, chocolate and vanilla.

Always get a chuckle from the selection of ladies names.

There aren’t different nozzles for different beverages anymore, lass. You have to select using the touch screen.

I started milking cows when I was in grade school. My instructor was one of my uncles. He showed me the milking stool, and I told him I couldn’t sit on that because it only had one leg. It was a short log with a flat board mailed across one end. He told me that it had three legs. “You sit on it and you have two legs and it has one, that makes three legs. Do the math!”.

The one in the very back gives chocolate.

Nothin is more pleasin’ than a teet to be squeezin’ in the mor-or-ornin’!

(I feel like I may be stealing one of Ish’s old ones here. If so, TOUGH TEETY! I CLAIM IT!)

Maria discovered that she could put up a billboard picturing her milking the cow and no one was the wiser.

A Woman Milking a Cow: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pirosmani._Woman_Milking_a_Cow.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this painting.

http://www.all-art.org/art_20th_century/pirosmani1.html 

http://www.artcyclopedia.ru/pirosmanashvili_nikolaj_aslanovich.htm 

https://prabook.com/web/niko.pirosmani/1034541 

https://www.wikiart.org/en/niko-pirosmani 

http://www.pirosmani.org/pirosmani/ 

https://www.freeart.com/gallery/p/pirosmani/pirosmanibio.html 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist (again, Google Chrome can automatically translate most webpages as necessary), perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the title URL. So far, 3 works by him have been used here (4 times, including a Holiday Classic repeat). 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2021/01/26?comments=visible 

has the prior (my comment there included 5 of the artist info URLs).

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2668 (March 22, 2021) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

Call me when it’s a cow milking a woman..

Mary Lou was so in need of male companionship, she tugged a little to hard on the cow and gave her red teets.

You think you have it tough? Why, when I was your age, we had to carry the cow through three feet of snow before we milked it!