Close to Home by John McPherson for December 25, 2022

Not a very Merry Christmas for the Feglers kids.

Recipe for a meltdown.

I like how the playstation controller looks like an old atari joystick.

sAd …

And where’s her husband? Oh right, he’s sharing a bed with his neighbors wife.

Wife wants to know if she could time share Me.

Learning to share is a great gift to give your kids.

It’s Christmas Day and I’m fresh out of funny, so here’s Bleeb’s Christmas poem from the year 2020.

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and Bleeb’s on his feet, not skulkin’ ‘round your legs, or ‘round your feet. He’s up north with Ol’ Santa, helping him pack, and he’s taking a break for his “favorite snack”…

(don’t let him fool you… it’s booze)

Saint Nick’s made his plan, and it unfurls, it’s to deliver great gifts for good boys and girls. As the elves load his sleigh, Saint Nick takes a snooze, while Bleeb wonders the house, still looking for booze.

A power nap is required, for a long Christmas flight, if Santa is well rested, good kids will delight. While Santa naps, Bleeb puts a buzz on, as Santa dreams of beating Ol’ Amazon.

The sleigh is all ready, Mrs. Claus wakes up Santa, to start his long trek with that layover in Atlanta! For some reason there seems, to be a small quandary, Bleeb is not ready… he’s asleep on their laundry. Santa whistles for Bleeb to get up and get going, Bleeb springs to his feet with a powerful “BOING!”

Santa shouts: “C’mon Bleeb, don’t make us late, we have to get flying and the reindeer won’t wait! Now get up on ol’ Rudolph and let us take flight, I have to be done with this in one night”.

So away they all flew, in just a blink, and Saint Nick was heard yelling: “WHAT THE HECK IS THAT STINK… HAVE YOU BEEN IMBIBING IN A WHOLE BUNCH OF DRINK?!!

Off in the distance, but clean out of sight, Bleeb’s heard exclaiming:

“It’s not me!”

(BURRRRRRRRRP)

“Okay-okay… you’re probably right!“

Merry Christmas to all,

— Dobie

Don’t laugh, it just MIGHT happen. Or is already happening…

Merry Christmas!

I think we did that sort of thing when I was a kid, the difference was that the kids went to different houses not the toys.

Merry Christmas Bleeb, and to you, Mr. McPherson!

MERRY CHRISTMAS‼️‼️

I’d convert my house into a Airbnb and have ppl play the PlayStation right where I can see them

And make sure there’s some visible red stripe left on those candy canes. Ewww!

“You will own nothing and be happy.”

Yeah, merry Christmas kids.

Merry Christmas Bleeb, and all. I hope no one timeshares you!!!!! :)

Kids: Holy crap!

Merry Christmas wherever you are Po’Dawg!!! :)

It’s a great idea! Recycle the toys (and clothes) every year! There are plenty of kids hoping to have a different toy.

Bruh, that’s not a Playstation controller Robbie is using. X’D It’s an Atari 2600 controller