Close to Home by John McPherson for July 15, 2023

of those bars were any further apart he might be out of a job as well

He has a point. A stupid one, but a point.

A person could easily fit through those bars

Just another public servant…

Keyser Söze?

Put me out of a job, I dare you.

Las Vegas cop solved that problem, robbed 3 casinos!! Job security!

Shut up before I gag you!

Sadly, that utopia won’t happen this side of heaven.

That cell can’t hold Bleeb who should get his little yellow butt out of there and find something worth observing!

It takes a special sort of person to be a prison guard. I’ve met a few. Not professionally, of course.

O no bleeps in jail

Not to worry dude, lose a couple of pounds and you can walk between the bars

Okay… can we give some serious thought to maybe, oh I dunno… sending Bleeb a birthday cake with a rock hammer and a poster of Raquel Welch in it!?

2 months of their food he could slip right through those bars.

Ah an LA citizen I see

Sad to say, you just can’t argue with that logic.

Well, he’s not wrong!

Reminds me of an old Flip Wilson joke that’s too long too long to write out. Basically a preacher is upset that his wife is constantly giving in to temptation and always says to him, “the Devil made me do it.” And the preacher says to her, “It seems the Devil is always doing this sort of thing for you, what has he ever done for me?” And she replies, “He said that if it weren’t for him, you wouldn’t have a job.” RIP Flip.

Cops invent crimes to keep themselves busy (https://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-proactive-policing-crime-20170925-story.html) and prisons create future criminals. It’s a great racket, and it only costs us about 50% of all city budgets, and 5-10% of all state budgets, not to mention the tax money that gets shoveled into private for-profit prisons.

And they would love to have a world where a Police force and Military aren’t necessary. Sadly, that is impossible in this world…..

Unfortunately there will always low-life guys like you.

Bleeb has an important message for everyone over at Ziggy.

Very few people in prison ever thought they would be caught.

Right, because that’s the only reason people are in jail.

See, always something good in everything!!!

hey have to keep the bars widely spaced because there’s no door

Alas. In some city’s the jail cell has no bars, just a revolving door.

Thank you for service?

We’d all be happier. From what I hear, those poor guards really put up with a lot of nasty stuff. Yes, some of them are nasty, too. I heard of one prison that was doing much better than usual, but then some judge or politician decided they were exposing the poor prisoners to too much religion! Everybody who thinks we need to just let more people out should first work as a guard for a week or two or try taking one of those guys home and reforming him that way. Hmm, we might get more support for capital punishment that way.