Close to Home by John McPherson for December 09, 2023

Now that is priority mail.

This year christmas falls on a sunday. There are no deliveries.

In 2011 this was not fiction.

There’s still time for more stupid…

My ol’ Grampa once told me: “Boy, there are two types of people in this world… those that can find an answer through simple deduction… and you might actually be the other’n!

Grampa woulda been proud to know, that I haven’t given up trying to deduce what he was………. wait a minute!

The USPS delivers for Amazon and UPS.

Seems fair since the U. S. Postal Service validated his existance in The Miracle On 34th Street .

Heck, just cut the deliveries to one day a week for all I care. All we ever get is junk mail anyway. At the beginning of the COVID pandemic when we were all in tizzy about the potential biohazards of touching the delivered mail, I started just picking it up once a week (we have a cluster box that requires walking down to the end of the block to get the mail from – and it can easily hold a week’s worth of mail). And it was never a problem and I found it didn’t really matter. We do use the USPS Informed Delivery email service that tells us every day what’s coming, just in case something really important comes – which is rare to never. So even after the pandemic panic – I STILL only bother to pick up the mail once a week and that works just fine. And it saves time. Throwing away the junk mail goes a lot more quickly when you do it in bulk once a week than bit by bit every day.

I miss the days of my childhood when there weren’t deliveries on Sunday, most stores were closed and people spent time at church and relaxing with family and friends.

That’ll be cool. Christmas every saturday

Just what I need, Santa bring bills.

Not a good time for that, he’s his own deliveries to make.

Ha! Exploiting Santa’s Goodwill could definitely backfire.

Putting mail in the box required thinking outside the box.

SEPTIMUS PRIME in disguise…

“Dad! Dad, I just saw Santa! I think—I think he was taking a picture with his smartphone. Wait. Does Santa deliver for Amazon now?”