Sherman's Lagoon by Jim Toomey for June 02, 2024

Too bad no button for nice.

Gee Hawthorne, why would you want calls when angry mobs across the oceans would love to know your number.

Does he have a second phone in airplane mode for collection agents?

I’m the go to tech guy in the family. It gets exhausting sometimes.

Well, Hawthorne, the reason nobody calls you is because you always insult them, and who wants to call somebody who insults them?

That’s a good suggestion, Hawthorne.

If Hawthorne got phone calls, there’d be a whole lotta #*$÷!

In that case, he’ll have to identify as a different species. I suggest clownfish, everyone loves a clown!

Ads don’t show up on my phone anymore. How do I fix that?

I remember the first computer, for business, I got a TANDY 1000 …… had a guy come out to make a program that did a lot of calculations for the project, that I had a contract for …………. well he did the programming and awhile later I had to change a couple of calculations, called him and now he was too busy and it would cost about double …… so I told him that I’d get back to him ….. dug out the Manuel, looked up how to do or change the calculations ……. I thought, this can’t be right …… he had a long, loooooong program line ……………. the Manuel showed this short, a few steps program ……. after that I “DID” refer to the Manuel and have been doing my own programing ….. ;)

Hawthorne, just answer some of those spam ads. You will be getting calls hourly.

Hawthorne doesn’t know how to be nice.