From Not Always Right: My Family And Other Zombies
(I have had a migraine at work. The manager has called my brother to come pick me up while I take my medication and sit in the staff room with a wet towel over my head. The tablets completely throw me out and whenever someone tries to talk to me I can only muster a grunt.)
Manager: “He’s just in here. He hasn’t moved much so I think he’s sleeping.”
Colleague: “No, he’s been moaning every now and again. I rinsed his towel for him.”
Brother: “Oh, that’s fine. Just typical. Come on then, Zombie-[My Name].” lifting my towel “See, he’s even drooling. He must be hungry. Let’s get you some brains!”
(He practically carries me out of the store, telling anyone who noticed that I was turning into a zombie. Sadly one family took it seriously and fled the store. I found it hilarious, but I was too drained — I couldn’t show it until after the migraine had passed, two days later.)
j_m_kuehl 10 months ago
well they sure aren’t going for your brains
Yakety Sax 10 months ago
From Not Always Right: My Family And Other Zombies
(I have had a migraine at work. The manager has called my brother to come pick me up while I take my medication and sit in the staff room with a wet towel over my head. The tablets completely throw me out and whenever someone tries to talk to me I can only muster a grunt.)
Manager: “He’s just in here. He hasn’t moved much so I think he’s sleeping.”
Colleague: “No, he’s been moaning every now and again. I rinsed his towel for him.”
Brother: “Oh, that’s fine. Just typical. Come on then, Zombie-[My Name].” lifting my towel “See, he’s even drooling. He must be hungry. Let’s get you some brains!”
(He practically carries me out of the store, telling anyone who noticed that I was turning into a zombie. Sadly one family took it seriously and fled the store. I found it hilarious, but I was too drained — I couldn’t show it until after the migraine had passed, two days later.)
NOT my story.
Walrus Gumbo Premium Member 10 months ago
Actually, Eno, all that beer will make you well marbled with fat. You’d be a delicacy!
Sanspareil 10 months ago
Don’t worry Eno, the zombies are after brains, so you are quite safe!
mourdac Premium Member 10 months ago
No fears from Zombie Flanders.
Knightman Premium Member 10 months ago
Zombies can’t harm you Eno. They can’t get near you by a nose!!!
silverclaw33 9 months ago
Rule #1: Cardio
colddonkey 9 months ago
Your safe they just want your brain which you already lack.
assrdood 9 months ago
The pink fridge will ward them off.
PoodleGroomer 9 months ago
A keg takes up less space and you don’t have to risk going outside with the empties.
Jeff0811 9 months ago
Reminds me of someone I know who would be protected from fat head to big toe.
Frank Burns Eats Worms 9 months ago
He wants to beat ’em to the paunch.
the lost wizard 9 months ago
How does more beer help? Of all the stupid questions. :)
KEA 9 months ago
dunno but I thought Zombies went for brains… oh, wait…
wildlandwaters 9 months ago
c’mon, impkins…where’s the burp…
mistercatworks 9 months ago
They don’t go for the belly. They eat BRAINS!
Otis Rufus Driftwood 9 months ago
Zombies I thought wanted brains. If so, Eno will be fine.