Close to Home by John McPherson for February 13, 2025

Your call is important, to you. Please call another time.

At least it’s honest,

And all from the comfort of their mother’s basement.

“We can have one of our newest representatives help you. He’s a Nigerian Prince, and he’ll be happy to take control of your computer.”

Is there an unpaid child support line?

I think I’ll try to get through to my clean laundry line.

Watching adult web sites.

Buuut! Your call is still important to us.

Now he can tell people, he once spent three hours on hold with Triglorb customer service just to complain about their customer service.

Awesome, John!!!!!

A representative will be with you shortly. He had to leave the basement while his mother cleaned his ‘office’.

Your expected hold time is less than two days.