Frazz by Jef Mallett for September 29, 2012

Getting everybody above average is easy. You just lie.

simsonfan, there is no such thing as a failing kid. It’s all on the parents!

Varnes, I used to think that… until I had ‘one of those’ kids. He scoffed at any form of discipline from age 4; we were at school at least once a week to work with teachers (I started working for myself so I could be very flexible); we modified diet; he had at least 2 dr. appts. a week… Finally, at age 14, we enrolled him in a tough love program where he lived in the woods for a year. It worked out his violence, but not his other bad choices. Now he is in his mid-30’s & I can’t count the number of times he’s been in jail; he never finished HS; he has been arrested 4 times for DUI; he has had 4 near fatal accidents..I could go on, but I hope you get my point. I’ve been in support groups for 30 years.

a lot of things in life can be explained by the bell curve.

During my time at school they changed how they graded people. no more curves. instead your grades were based on how much YOU knew, and how much YOU had improved over the course of the year. Everyone could get an A+ (IF you improved enough and scored well enough) and no-one was compared to anyone but themselves.

Whenever I see someone do something really stupid, I’m reminded that intelligence is on a bell curve.

They don’t practice the idea of curves at my high school, and its lucky for the other kids they don’t; they wouldn’t get many, if any points

of course, this strip is talking about standardized tests which are intentionally made with approximately half the questions being ones the age the tests are for are not supposed to know. (Yeah, it’s a messed up system)

But would the standardized test of the superintendent’s dreams really have a flat bell curve? That would mean a uniform distribution of scores—exactly the same number of kids at every possible score from zero to 100 percent, which hardly seems like a good outcome! The “ideal” curve would seem to be one that’s an impulse function: everybody getting every question right. Or, at least, a curve with 90 percent of the scores above the midpoint (the Lake Wobegon curve, where all the children are above average)…

Perfect example of bad questions on standardized tests – a group of questions that assumed middle school students (usually ages 11-13) could drive a car. Also history questions that assumed topics were taught that aren’t in the state standards.

just remember, no matter where you fall on the bell curve, you still get to vote.

There are hills in Hillsdale, but no mountains in Mt. Clemens!

Them ain’t hills, hills you run out of breath going up. Shoot, you probably call those things in Tenn. mountains. Mountains you die if you make a mistake going up ’em.

Another way of expressing the bell curve: Sturgeon’s Law, commonly expressed as “90% of everything is crud.” Also, regarding averages: “You know how dumb the average guy can be? By definition, half of them are even worse.” -J. R. “Bob” Dobbs, from the Book of the SubGenius