Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 30, 2020

Pickles add up to nickels..

This keeps the lightbulb burning inside a cold fridge.

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Give them the bird.

I’ll put the pickles in my coffee.

…I am a fan of McDonald’s cheeseburgers…

… the McDouble is my fav…

…it’s the condiments really…

…the exact pickles being the tour the France…

…I went searching for the perfect McDouble pickle…

…most are too sour…

…or too sweet…

…most aren’t blah enough…

…I’ve decided McDonald’s Coupe de Ville with its pickles…

…is a texture thing…

…like the blahnik patty …

…you are tricked into believing the onions and catsup are great burger taste…

…and I’m fine with that…

…I could eat a Mcdouble all the time…

…just like my Vienna sausage…

…as long as there is different flavor…

…I could eat them every day…

…did I ever tell you the story about my old college girlfriend and the pickle?…

…opps, times up…

…gotta run…

The psychological tricks employed by grocery stores are actually quite breathtaking.

Hmmm..I wonder what else big companies manipulate us into believing?

 

… and all those pickles are watching you.

And the milk.

What? Oh… sorry. It doesn’t work if you aren’t paying attention. Cell phones are messing up their strategy.

a day without pickles is like a day without sunshine

You get a bag of green beans at the Safeway store, they look fine under their light.

Take them home and the real light reveals all the brown spots.

Only Americans put sliced pickles on sandwiches and hamburgers, this is appalling to the rest of the world.

Does that include cute canaries that perch on your busy shopping fingers, Nathan?

Actually, I am not impressed. I never keep more than one type of pickle in my fridge (kosher baby dills are where it’s at, my friend). And no milk no more. I drank enough when I was a kid. Now, none. Fruit juices more (orange juice, grape juice, sour cherry nectar, peach nectar, apricot nectar). Water. Beer. Even pop (soda, if that’s what your region prefers). No milk.

Suck it up, Nate!

Pickles is good.

Apparently a surveillance pickle, and nine other kinds.

Staples are a given sell in the grocery world … pickles challenge their entrepreneurial spirit and thus they enlist chicanery to fool the unwashed into destabilizing said staples and to fill fridges and pantries accordingly …! [CaFfEiNe]

Econ-Job 101

Speaking of caffeine, I’m surprised it hasn’t been added to pickles.

And now, egg nog. I have three containers in my fridge.

I’m wise to their tricks; only one jar of sweet relish (no HFCS), and almond milk for cereal. All bought at a discount because they were a month before the ridiculous “sell by” date.

We put the cheese at the far end of the maze, and have sticky packages that will adhere to the test subject as it traverses the maze.

Sweet, sour, brined, or relished, smickle, pickle, fickle, Don Rickle, Nickle, hick-el, kick-le, mick-le, quick-el,stick-ler,tick-ler,Vick-er,wick-le,….ok I’m done Lol

Is she going to eat those pickles or is she gonna use some of them for something,uh, never mind.

Please do not blame the grocery stores. This phenomenon results from a natural law. The same law which always causes the dropped toast to land jam side down.