Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for June 24, 2023

I think Timberlake tried that on SNL

Leave a comment on GoComics, should we purchase a McShark Sandwich or just the Shark Sandwich for a cougar like me?

Such implied licentiousness will not be tolerated. Signed, the Comics Censorship Board

…latest review of my novel…

…The story was so dry the pages of the book crumbled as a read it- the Froglandia Piqua…

 

This cartoon would have been nothing – ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ! – without the 2nd W in EWW.

Ew is right!

Gnawing at a package with my teeth is below my esteem.

Something is missing . . .

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61AQK4jtWbL.jpg

There. That’s better.

Unwelcome come-on number 84,686.

A toothsome example of a bad pick up line.

…*latest review of my novel*…

…The story was so dry that the pages of the book crumbled as I read it- the Froglandia Piqua…

Tsk, Tsk, Tsk T …!

( is he happy to see her? )

Wrapped in plain brown paper for her privacy.

I accidentally read the Comment Policy today. Yeah, accidentally. Bad click. #1 in the forbidden list is any comment of a 5exual nature. Then there are eight more no-no’s. I’m going all Thoreau on them by the following act of civil-comment disobedience. Watch out now. Here it comes: A personally identifiable information item about me is… my hair color is BROWN. Yes. There: It’s out there now! You can now find me in the next published photo of the bath mat factory employee group photo. Unless it is in black and white. Then just look for the UltraLame one.

I love that she groaned after “hello”. ;)

Just where does Teresa get off making a comic about me? How does she even know my middle names are Groan & Eww? The tendrils of Big Sister have gone too far!

Moosejaw, an outdoor equipment store chain, uses package tape and wrap printed with “NO KNIFE  USE TEETH”.

https://photos-us.bazaarvoice.com/photo/2/cGhvdG86bW9vc2VqYXc/7ad68f41-92e4-5da7-9291-6994f48509c2

https://i.redd.it/o22q5aoie8g01.jpg

Perhaps a reciprocating saw would be even better.

My zipper teeth or your foreskin naked zipper teeth with a snagglepuss bite.

Toothpaste and floss cut.

What a prize specimen this Old Line misogynist is!

The Lady would be justified, were she to accept his idiotic offer, in biting his sensitive bits off, or in just simply drawing her Self Defense piece and plugging the scumbag.

And, yes, I am ignoring Sister’s fiendish inclusion of what could be an innocent “package” in panel 2. It’s too late to plead innocence, brother….

Sure and a Bloody Mary for my fifth stringer.

Monty Hall, Let’s Make a Deal.

The package or The ZONKER HOLDING THE Package?

Really, something I can sink my teeth in?

A Nestle Crunch Bar® that will sink my Battle Ship Frog Applause™✓.

A punchline nicely packaged.