Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for November 23, 2009

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    WindSpider  almost 15 years ago

    Also known as the Morte-Deli?

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    DevXIII  almost 15 years ago

    You do realize there’s a film called “Delicatessen” that uses this as its’ main plot, right?

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    IncredibleWerekitty  almost 15 years ago

    All cuts of meat are 100% filler and additive free.

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    carmy  almost 15 years ago

    The Businessman Special. Since he’s on the menu, it will be a surprise special too.

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    fencepost  almost 15 years ago

    hm, that site redirects back to this page. Perhaps the contest was not ready quickly enough?

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    vasgar1  almost 15 years ago

    My creative juices are flowing!

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    cleokaya  almost 15 years ago

    We have an undressed turkey sandwich Also a sirloin strip. Oysters, unadorned on the half shell.

    Drink special:

    Strip and Go Naked Cocktail.

    Dessert special”

    Zested Orange peel Tart

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    madKanga  almost 15 years ago

    Nature red in tooth and cleaver

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    XslayerALE  almost 15 years ago

    Now Serving Man!

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    valsinger  almost 15 years ago

    Serving New Yorkers since 2008

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    nonsequitous  almost 15 years ago

    Now Serving Man!

    Gives new meaning to “Can I serve who’s next?”

    Oops! Gave away my contest entry.

    (or did he … )

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    nonsequitous  almost 15 years ago

    It takes guts to share your beliefs - and your chicken! Man, I do love a good chicken. And having a personal belief system ain’t too shabby either. - Kristi

    My Texas-born momma’s fried chicken was a religious experience!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D18NS0FJ83o

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    nonsequitous  almost 15 years ago

    You do realize there’s a film called “Delicatessen” that uses this as its’ main plot, right?

    Does Sweeney Todd get a … sl-l-lice of the profits?

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    wicky  almost 15 years ago

    Frickin chicasee.

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    marsupialtits  almost 15 years ago

    Soup Du Jour: Rats and Iguanas $9.11

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    ravens76mom  almost 15 years ago

    GRAND RE-OPENING! (under new management)

    Come on in & try one of our new & improved, “Other White Meat” (“Top-of-the-food-chain”) lunch items !

    (Avail. for a limited time only, while supplies last!)

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    captainedd  almost 15 years ago

    “Don’t Eat at Joe’s” Seen it in a cartoon…where a pl\ilgrim was eaten by a…bear!

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    Jigalong  almost 15 years ago

    Specials from our own Sandwich Designers

    FEED THAT MAN MEAT

    Seductive Soy meat $ 5.99 Big Beefy Nutmeat $ 5.45 Hearty Tofu Meat $ 5.75 Juicy Branmite minute steak $ 6.20

    All sandwiches served with fresh naturally grown organic leaves, tossed in our delicious, chlorine free, non-buffered spring water.

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    cleothemuse  almost 15 years ago

    We put the “buff” in “buffet”!

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    avarner  almost 15 years ago

    “Baked Snake & a ‘Tater - $2.99”

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    AlanS327  almost 15 years ago

    “Stupidity will be served”

    or

    “Now serving: stupidity”

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    bobo67  almost 15 years ago

    Special Today

    Extra-Fresh

    “Chipped Meat”

    (Provides Guaranteed Weight Loss)

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    porthos  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special

    Long Pig

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    DanoTheResistor  almost 15 years ago

    today’s special

    Business Man Lunch

    “the other white meat”

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    DanoTheResistor  almost 15 years ago

    today’s special:

    is selected at random

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    DanoTheResistor  almost 15 years ago

    today’s special:

    Bob-ka-bobs,

    Come on in Bob

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    ecobill  almost 15 years ago

    Not for the weak of heart or the hugh of body.

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    rinzai  almost 15 years ago

    “Our lunch special is to die for.”

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    Lyons Group, Inc.  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special Cook: Jon Arbuckle

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    njchris  almost 15 years ago

    believe it or not, but here in NJ there was a store actually named “The Cat and Dog Deli”

    sure wish I had a picture of it now.

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    eric stott  almost 15 years ago

    “Eat here and you will never eat any place else”

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    All meat served rare!

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Wanted!!!! Cooks Diswhshers Cashiers Waiters

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    merlin07  almost 15 years ago

    “Certified by the Hannibal Lecter school of Culinary Arts”

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Cash for Chunkers

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Wanted! Couch Potatoes

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    royman53  almost 15 years ago

    Welcome! Enter freely, and of your own accord.

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    puddleglum1066  almost 15 years ago

    Gives a whole new meaning to the claim that “Customer Delight is our most important product.”

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    mightywombat  almost 15 years ago

    I thought there were going to be contest details here…? I don’t want to post my entry unless I know this is the right place to do it!

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    prrdh  almost 15 years ago

    With apologies to Rod Serling: We Serve Mankind.

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    prrdh  almost 15 years ago

    With apologies to Rod Serling: We Serve Mankind.

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Pardon the mess, please come in!

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    Wiley creator almost 15 years ago

    Ok, folks…? You can’t enter the contest here. Click on the link at the top of the page. Your posts here aren’t considered, but someone might steal your idea and submit it.

    And, no, I never heard of the movie, “Delicatessen”.

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    HabaneroBuck  almost 15 years ago

    All cuts of meat prepared to your exact specifications.

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    ds133  almost 15 years ago

    “Today’s Specials

    Fred and Chips Charlie Parmesan Sub Roast Ben Club Sandwich”

    This reminds me of the natural selection diner strip with the shish-ka-‘Bob’ as the menu / employee of the week

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special

    Chicken Apples Tarts Specimens

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    DLBCyTx Premium Member almost 15 years ago

    Come on In…

    We’ll be Glad You Did!

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    Tougas  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special :

    The Natural Order

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special

    homme a la chat

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    printmaker  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special: filet d’homme

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    comicreadersincebirth  almost 15 years ago

    New Menu

    Animal Health Care Reform

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    DrDeming  almost 15 years ago

    Come be a part of our lunch buffet special!

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    ScratchyPDX  almost 15 years ago

    “Pet Appreciation Week…Why not Wok your dog today?”

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    gavinseviltwin  almost 15 years ago

    Special: All u-can eat buffet

    Dine-In only

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    ed_lab  almost 15 years ago

    NEW Food chain! (where you don’t have to be the fittest)

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    btorgan  almost 15 years ago

    Come on in and get the skinny.

    Two for one special

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    PRICH311  almost 15 years ago

    Please send your entries for the Non Sequitur Sign Off to nonseqsignoff@amuniversal.com. We also need your Name, Phone Number, Email Address and Hometown Newspaper (if applicable). Just out the full rules and details on the Blog.

    -GoComics Team

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    kkhs1976  almost 15 years ago

    “Where YOU are what WE eat!”

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    kramyellek  almost 15 years ago

    There is no link to the contest at the top of the my web page using Firefox. Appears the geeks want you to use IE instead.

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    Digital Frog  almost 15 years ago

    Sandwich Specials:

    Monty Crisco Sloppy Joe

    served with a side of soylent greens…

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    warrabit  almost 15 years ago

    Obama Stimlus Spaghetti $10 Trillion Pelosi Partisan Pudding $8.5 Billion Reid “Ridin’ the Fence” Peyote Free in CA & CO Beiden Bullion (Thin and watery) $Priceless

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    chicagopollack  almost 15 years ago

    Specials-

    PETit fours creme brutee

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    Lurah  almost 15 years ago

    Failed Species Special - Cheap Cuts

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    QwertyPDX  almost 15 years ago

    New Customer Special!

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    simonbmorse  almost 15 years ago

    Meet the missing Cleaver family member and it’s not Beaver!

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    timbarb2  almost 15 years ago

    Come in and make YOURSELF a Meal

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    OakDragon  almost 15 years ago

    “To Serve Man” was a short story by Damon Knight before Rod Serling adapted it for The Twilight Zone.

    I once entered pork chili in a chili cook-off, giving it the title, “Mock Chili con Hombre.”

    My other thought is from “Fried Green Tomatoes…”

    Good Barbecue!

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  68. Danae
    Wiley creator almost 15 years ago

    Hellooooooooooo…. This is NOT the contest page! Click on the link at the top of the page to enter, and please read the instructions on HOW TO ENTER.

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    Joelobiondo  almost 15 years ago

    Homme Cooking.

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    brolin1911a1  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s special – Baked Alaskan

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    yyyguy  almost 15 years ago

    apparently people cannot follow instructions.

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    ebrooks  almost 15 years ago

    Puree aux homme

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    DenverDaves  almost 15 years ago

    Hope the Non Secuitur “sign-off” is an intellectual contest and not the END!

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    treered  almost 15 years ago

    come in and meet the meat (apologies to HHGTTG)

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    Trebor39  almost 15 years ago

    You will now become part of the food chain. Today we are serving soylent green with mashed potatoes and gravy.

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    jamadison4  almost 15 years ago

    THAT’S NO BULL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    CoBass  almost 15 years ago

    @kramyellek Re: No link at the top of the page when using Firefox

    Try refreshing / reloading the page. The link wasn’t there when I first came to the site, but showed up when I went to page 2 of the comments and was still there when I went back to page 1. You and I probably just ran into a timing issue, where we came to the page before the link was added to the page. (FWIW, I’m running Firefox 3.5.5.)

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    Abensneezer  almost 15 years ago

    Check your clothes at the door

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    Lawrence Stetz Premium Member almost 15 years ago

    Abensneezer: Geez, that would be a large pile of clothes at the end of the day.

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    Jiblet_VT  almost 15 years ago

    The comments are better than the contest. A “bazaar” of entries and no waiting for a winner!

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    Kids under six eaten free.

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    reynard61  almost 15 years ago

    Today’s Special: Freshest “Man”-wiches in town!

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    No shirt, no shoes, no problem.

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    Try our chef’s surprise.

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    Nobody leaves unsatisfied.

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    Try our pan-fried poodles.

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    We eat what you are.

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    lorelei6361  almost 15 years ago

    Prrdh: That’s “To Serve Man”

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    bigswan  almost 15 years ago

    Dress is Optional

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    Come in hungry, leave us happy.

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    rosedude  almost 15 years ago

    We use only the freshest ingredients.

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    DeanBooth  almost 15 years ago

    TODAY’S SPECIAL

    ALL YOU, CAN EAT!

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    Beverly Howard  almost 15 years ago

    This is NOT the contest page! <<

    The contest page is not near as fun as these pages… and, it’s a lot more rigid.

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    Rodney99  almost 15 years ago

    You wanna piece of me???

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    trying2keepup  almost 15 years ago

    Not sure what should be on the sign, but a place called Au Naturel with pussies in the window might be fun.

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    nonsequitous  almost 15 years ago

    ”You can’t enter the contest here. Click on the link at the top of the page. Your posts here aren’t considered, but someone might steal your idea

    But that (scribbling furiously) would be (‘Morte-deli’ - good one) wrong!

    and submit it.” - Wiley

    (pencil breaking bleeep bleeep) [ file > save page as > … ]

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    die2win  almost 15 years ago

    Mmmmm Pussycat Pastrami

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  98. Madkanga
    madKanga  almost 15 years ago

    Never mind, Wiley - we know where to enter the contest, but this is a good place to try out our second best lines.

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    JP Steve Premium Member almost 15 years ago

    Wow! The competition is awesome! I’m going to have to really think about my entry!

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    desturbedlio  almost 15 years ago

    “Warning, not appropriate for children under 18”

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    JoeDGiusto  almost 15 years ago

    We serve your pet foods.

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