Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for October 02, 2012

The devil may be there, and for that re-fi contract, you might only not read every line, you pry had a 1% chance to pass in college

Death: “Yeah, business has been booming since those came out.”

well, another fine mess you’ve got us into…

Very reminiscent of “Come Then, Mortal-We Will Seek Her Soul” by Michael Shea.

Apparently not many!

The boat looks a little like a hand basket.

must be a fha loan

Too many people are making this trip.

The terms are approved by the Lethal Dept., not Legal.

He looks like a real Styx-ler for the rules.

We’ve all got to go sometime.

Mark of darkness.

We’re all in this boat right now. We’ve sold our soul as a free nation.

They gave up a nice home in suburbia to go live in the Styx.

Mortgage documents are the best sleeping pill money can buy. Read at bedtime, they ensure quick and peaceful sleep in seconds. Try it next time you’re tossing and turning.

And richly deserved last boat ride, too. (The interest rate was very, very good. It was the closing costs that got them.)

Signing those contracts is a gamble…like rolling dem bones!

The devil is in the details.

‘An oral contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on’. Samuel Goldwyn

“Abandon Hope all Ye who enter here” should be on the door of every bank.

Actually my husband reads every line. That’s why what is usually a 30 minute “signing party” with a notary takes us about 3 hours. Needless to say, the notary usually isn’t very happy.

Styx and bones will break your stones.

What? No lifejackets?

Who reads every line on a re fi contract? Anyone who doesn’t want the bank to “Styx” it to them.

I thought it was the river Styx.Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me,

For that matter, who ever reads every line of any contract, except lawyers

Huh? Why not? Do you have a good lawyer (insert joke here) to read them for you? I read every legitimate contract I sign, since I’m either contracting my services and want to get paid, applying for a grant and need to know the terms and conditions, or borrowing a considerable sum of money and don’t want to be sent down the river with Charon as above. Although… a sip from the river Lethe would be nice…

Oh, there are dead gods. Dead Cthulhu lies dreaming in his house at R’Lyeh, waiting for the stars to be right. Pan ceased to exist when people stopped believing in him. Enlil (or was it Marduk?) slew Tiamat in the Babylonian creation story Enûma Eliš, a precursor to the creation story in Genesis.

You know one time when I was downloading a new game and I had to read that contract that nobody reads, I just scrolled down randomly and stopped. I then read the first sentence that came to me. It said something to do with agreeing to let a monkey jump on my head. True story.