The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for February 16, 2012

You have the culprit, boys. Get him to sweat and overheat a little.

Come around next cycle…maybe we’ll find him.

Sorry Officer; can you be more specific? (Cue the “villian” music.)

It’s an open-and-shut case.Cut and dried.

Sock it to him.

Her name was May Tag. She had once been married to Ken More; a shiftless appliance who was washed up in the cleaning business. Their divorce was a dirty business.

The appliance is a Kelvinateher.

NOTE: I can’t remember who to attribute this to..Socks lost in the dryer turn into the bundle of metal hangers in the bottom of the closet.

No, no! They go off into the Hose Zone.

At some point she’ll realize he’s really gone and will need to get paired up again.

That jackboot cop is crazy if he thinks that dyer will tumble for him. Besides, the dryer is giving up socks for lint.

Softener him up a bit and he’ll be more likely to spill the jeans

How much is Jason Coe paying you LOL!

look for the sock with a hole in the toe

The cops must be from the Missing Hosiery Bureau.

Mrs. Sock will join the club of widows

I think the cop is consoling the sock who has lost its sole-mate.

Actually, missing socks transport to the attic where given sufficient time they transmute into coat hangers.

dryer lint is the cremated remains of all my missing socks.

I think the Mrs. is spinning a yarn.

“No, but I’ve tasted him.”

Where do you think all that lint in your dryer come from? Your socks baby! You know you put them in there, then they gone. Nobody knows how they turn into lint either. I think it’s magic.

Darn that thing.

“Argyle” sweater does a strip about a sock?

Actually most socks that go missing are sucked into the outlet of the washing machine. You don’t notice they are missing until the clothes come out of the dryer.

Beviek — Thanks! This place is a minefield today!

He was framed. Every one know the washer steals the socks and blames it on the dryer.