The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for September 22, 2020

Tsense and Tsensibility

THE BIG TSLEEP, the story of sleeping sickness.

“Tstop in the Name of Love.” The Tsupremes

“TSomething Wicked This Way Comes.” A Tse Tse fly!

His most admired philosopher is Lao-Tse.

Glossina Morsitans, or, the Tsetse

A Glossina Morsitans bit rich Aunt Betsy.

Tsk, Tsk, Tsetse.

—Ogden Nash

All guaranteed to put you to sleep!

Their leader must be the Tsar of Tsetses!

does he read on the fly…?

Lord of Tse Flies

Crossword puzzle solvers know the tsetse’s favorite poet – TS Eliot.

I bet his favorite movie is “A Tstar is Born”.

Death of a Tsalesman.

I’ll check on my Tsmart phone for more titles.

He has an eclectic tsate in books.

Tseriously? This is tstupid!

Tslaughterhouse-Five, Tstuart Little and Tstranger in a Tstrange Land.

Joy of Tsex — Tsk, tsk

If he has a lithp, cover up like the first three rows at a Gallagher show.

Oh tshit, please Tstop.

Looks like the Imperial Russian Library.

LOL!

“A Tskit, a Tskat” …. i forget the rest

Tsk, tsk.

I can tsee clearly now the rain has gone,

I can tsee all ob-tsacles in my way…

Tsilly Tscott Hilburn!

Hey! You bullies making fun of my lisp? Bite me!

This hurts my head. I’m gonna have a Tsingtao beer.

Tsk tsk tsetse goodbye, tsk tsk tsetse don’t cry

“There’tse Tsomething About Mary”.

Wouldn’t it me more like “The Tscarlet-tscarlet Letter”?

Cyrillic is an economical alphabet: the character ц makes the “ts” sound, as in ‘tsar’.

Favorite comic: “The Argyle Tsweater”.