Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for June 26, 2015

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak Comix Edited by Ruben Bolling Aunt-Man Bitten by a radioactive aunt, James Jansen gained the proportionate powers of an aunt! Aunt-Man: Wait...is that balloon getting BIGGER? How...? Boy: That's your ONE WEAKNESS, Aunt Man! Boy: Inability to comprehend temporal size changes. Aunt-Man: And, my word! YOU'VE gotten so BIG! The Comic Strip That Has A Finale Every Day I'm happy to announce that due to public response this comic WILL NOT END, but will go on having its finale every day! - John Scully TOMORROW...GOODBYE AGAIN! Percival Dunwoody, Idiot Time-Traveler From 1909 Percival: These filthy rocks you dig up and burn for fuel are amazing! Man: Um, coal was used in 1909. Percival: And you still use it in the 21st century? Marital Mirth Wife: What are you doing? Husband: Trying to kill you by sheer force of hate. How To Draw Doug, feat. Chaos Butterfly 1. Brazil 2. Nine days later, in Chicago Man: Wha? Sudden gust... INK INK INK INK Digital Rights Management Funnies Doug: I'm on a low-fat diet! Man: But Doug... Doug: I only eat fat...SITTING DOWN! ZIP FBI WARNING YOU ARE ONLY AUTHORIZED TO VIEW THIS COMIC STRIP ONCE. FEDERAL LAW PROVIDES SEVERE CIVIL AND CRIMINAL PENALTIES FOR THE UNAUTHORIZED RE-VIEWING OF THE ABOVE COPYRIGHTED PIECE OF GRAPHIC DIET HUMOR. If your eyes drift upward to once again enjoy the weight-loss foibles of the lovable yet somewhat rotund cartoon character Doug, you will be subject to FBI investigation, and could be punished with up to a $25,000 fine or five years in prison. Printing this cartoon out, or cutting it out of a printed page, for the purposes of taping onto a refrigerator, or any appliance for cooling or heating, or to tack onto a bulletin board at work is RIGHT OUT. Seriously, do that and expect a SWAT team or even Seal Team Six to rappel down from the roof of your home and crash into your bedroom window while you're sleeping. You are required to retain a copy of this Warning and keep it on your body at all times. Carefully detach it from the cartoon, making certain not to look at or enjoy the cartoon again, and laminate it for future reference. Super-Fun-Pak Comix reserves the right to modify the terms of this Warning and to impose new conditions on your use of this cartoon. Like right now, we just decided you are prohibited from reminiscing about reading it.