Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for March 02, 2025

Don’t forget to measure twice!

Run, Barry. Run!

Barry should have seen the cut scene coming

Jason has two circular saws! Run for your life, Barry!

Good morning, Ballard Dears!

Windell Sawyer: The Good, the Bad, and he Ugly one on Ballard Street.

This does not bode well for someone’s fingers.

/// Barry’s sorting his best boards and humming.

Lost in thought, never saw “Saw Man” coming.

Heard the saws! With a board

he detached every cord

from the battery, stopping the thrumming.

The deleted idea for “Saw”.

After all the forests have finally burned down, Barry’s collection is very valuable.

He came. He sawed. He conquered.

(Sorry, it had to be said)

The Saw Bandolero Cometh near

He views the lumber remnants with a sneer

He is in no way a Nice Man

Rather is a cold-hearted Slice Man

But Barry causes Slice Man to fail

Within each wood piece is a broken nail

A TOPICAL LIMERICK…

While Barry was counting his planks,

A stranger approached from the banks.

He destroyed all his boards,

Cos he couldn’t afford,

His ‘protection’ and didn’t say “thanks!”

Just tell him to buzz off.

He miter might not cut the boards.

There’s never a dull moment around Gene; he won’t let anyone get board.

Windell Sawyer has a reputation around Ballard as a man who will cut you to the quick if you annoy him. Poor Barry’s perfectionist woodworking aspirations are soon going to be cut down to size by Windell.

Run, Barry, run!

There once was a fella named Barry,

with his boards he just loved to tarry.

Then along came a man, who’ll only slice his own hand,

So, old Barry had no need to be wary…

This is gonna cut Barry to the quick.

Barry is a happy Soul who enjoys playing with his boards happily all the day long but along comes the anti enthusiast villain who maniacally enjoys sawing boards up into kindling wood and splinters. The sawdust is for the next aficionado of wood parts.

He heard a buzz…saw a man.

He gathered his boards and away he ran

Barrys collection is about to feel the final cut…

Good morning Balladeers!

Didn’t anyone else hear the theme song from The Good, The Bad and The Ugly?

I saw what Esau saw. :)

if he had saws with dedicated battery packs he wouldn’t need that auto/marine battery… be a whole lot easier… (I can’t imagine how that battery cutting into his back feels… ouch!) (Plus, I’ve never seen a circular saw that runs on 12 volts)

The bored bandito has arrived.

I met a blind carpenter. He picked up his hammer and saw.

barry will soon have a cutting edge board collection… ☺