The Duplex by Glenn McCoy for January 11, 2010

Half-caf and a half-wit.

Most of the time Eno’s brain is asleep too.

Just have to drink twice as much half-caf so why bother.

Must be why Eno gets happy feet when he drinks beer!

With Half-and-Half, no doubt.

(Would real cream make it the fatted caf?)

DOC TOON What about your brew? I thought the caff went off the Richter scale

Do they make half beer?

Half-caf, served by the half-carafe.

(C’mon, that’s worth a half-laugh…)

sounds more like a stroke.

I gave the joke a halffarted laff.

Woodeye

I’m with you on the half-wit! lol

Hmmmm… Is it the half-presence of caffeine that allows his right side to function, or the half-absence that’s impairing his left side? If he drinks a second cup, will it awaken his sleeping side, or merely double the imbalance?

Eno is holding the coffee cup in his right hand, indicating he’s probably right-handed and left-brained (although there’s a possibility that, were his left side not asleep, he’d be holding the cup in the other hand). His speech centers seem to be unimpaired, yet his memory appears faulty (he had forgotten that he is drinking half-caf, yet is able to articulate his memory lapse). This memory-loss symptom is contra-indicative of a pathological explanation, because fact-retrieval is a function of the (presumably functional) left hemisphere of the brain.

Without the benefit of extensive neurological scanning, and ideally some cognitive experiments to see whether his logical and emotional reasoning processes have been affected, we can’t be sure just how extensive Eno’s condition is, but we’d better do some exploratory surgery just in case. Call the anaesthetist, STAT, and tell him to bring the BIG hammer…

Two words - “Jolt Cola”

In real life that’s the classic symtoms of a stroke.

duh, i said that 6 hours ago. should read the notes on the way down……can you hold your hand over your head. never mind……another stroke victim.

Easy stroke test - just stick out your tongue. If it won’t go straight, there’s a problem. Smiling helps too - if it is lopsided, that’s an indication.