Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 10, 2012

Great attention and assertiveness.Wrong details.

Larry must have thought he was on “Undercover Boss.”

Silly Croc, your nose isn’t brown enough!

I don’t interview well, either….Where’s his beer?

I think I’ll try that line if I ever meet Rush Limbaugh. You never know, he might be doped up enough for it to work.

Larry this is a job you are appling for not welfare. With a job in this country one must first work then get monies. Maybe “BOB” croc can fill him in on this small detail.

Actually, Larry is slowly getting the hang of this job-hunt thing. Today he wore a tie to his fruitless “interview.” That’s something, folks. Maybe next week he’ll learn when to shut up.

Right after college, I applied for a job and while being interviewed someone in the office stole my raincoat that I was told to hang up in the waiting room. After reimbursing me, the potential employer told me I would not be hired. I’m sorry I didn’t tell him that I wouldn’t want to work in an office where other employees walked off with someone else’s raincoats.

I love the croc toons; as soon as I see a croc, I know I can skip right over the strip.

Larry was a tad too assertive.

But he wore a tie!

Sadly I want to model this behavior

Some people can’t handle the truth.

What do you think, would a red tie go better with his green birthday suit?

You dumb. No monies for you.

I reject your rejection. I will start next week. Improve your rejection skills for the next guy.

Ees no fair fat guy no hire Larry. Just wun more way the MAN ees keeping croks down.

‘Let me show you to the door, Sir. And don’t come back!’

LOL xxx

The problem is that Larry is completely trapped in an outdated paradigm of zeeba killin. In 2013, you don’t manually go out and kill zeebas. You bio-engineer zeeba meat . . . pre-killed with long shelf life. Zeeba eeting all bout distribushun, not killin. Larry need retrainin.

Are we sure that’s not Rat in a croc suit?

I find it interesting that croc wives and children can use proper grammar, but the dudes seem perpetually stuck in an absinthe-induced fog. Always good for a laugh.

I should have threatened too eats heem.