Last Kiss by John Lustig for March 31, 2010

Could this be the (in)famous Tabitha “Tabs” Von Tramp. So called because she always has more than on “project” going at a time?

Maybe “Tabs” Von Tramp has ADD?!

So she’s the one that first said “Peach, I shoulda painted the ceiling peach….”, during sex.

I ‘m sure she said a lot of things … and to a lot of people.

Spit take.

…margueritem said what I was going to say…

during sex she yells…… when she wins at solitaire.

FunnyDeeds, would that make her “Addy” Von Tramp?

Tabs’s checking account is always reconciled.

Shiny things distract her too.

Musicachairs Von Tramp? A new position every time the music stops?

Never let the left one of these know what the right one of these is doing.

She bears a remarkable resemblance to Doris Day.

oh, not with YOU, sweetheart! only when I have sex with those other guys!

AD/HD: Attention Deficit/Hottie Disorder.

“Ambidextra Von Tramp?”

Isn’t this the same couple from the 24th in the tatoo joke

Ah yes… there’s nothing quite like Group Sex! “Joan, place your knee on Joe’s right buttock while whispering the Preamble of the Constitution in Anne’s ear. Anne, lick Arnie’s heel while pouring the melted chocolate over TIna’s elbow. Tina, sing ‘La Dolce Vita’ in Finnish while shaving Gerhard’s long-hair dachshund. Gerhard, tickle Joan’s other knee. I’ll be over here, filming the whole thing for NudeTube, and tossing the random water balloon filled with condiments. Pretend I’m not here.” Or were you thinking along the lines of “lie back and think of the Queen”? (This only works with British lasses. Sometimes I like to recite Shakespeare’s St. Crispin’s Day speech… “O that we now had here / But one ten thousand of those men in England / That do no work to-day!” …during the act.) Does thinking of baseball stats to prolong the inevitable count? What about thinking of that hot number I saw on the bus while shtumpfing my girlfriend? What about when I think of my next “appointment”? (Dolores likes tulips, and I need to make a reservation at Le Circque for my date with Babette, and I need to pick up the Kangaroo costume from the dry cleaners before I meet Dardanelle…) In that case, I think you want to use the term “ambisextrous”.