Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for June 18, 2015

But, we’re only trying to help……….sheesh, who knew the Lady even knew those words, Lupin here, Sorry about that folks, we were beeped off the air just now.

And the Lady learned to empty the vacuum cleaner where the boys can’t get at it!

HAH.

The first rules of felinity:

1. You must be able to shed your own body weight in hair every day. Without ever looking as if you have!

2. No matter what color you are, and no matter what color the soft furnishing is, you must be able to shed a contrasting color to whatever soft furnishing you are on.

3. When there are visitors, you must be able to locate the person who most hates cats, or ideally who is most allergic, so that you can spend all your time with them.

Sign in my front hallway for all visitors to read:

TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT MY PETS:

(1) They live here. You don’t.

(2) If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That’s why they call it ‘fur’-niture.

(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don’t speak clearly.

Way to go boys!!!!! That’ll show her.

If Lupin is deaf then the noise won’t bother him-I used t0 vacuum my deaf cat and he loved it." And this time it’s personal" is my favorite panel today.

These cats mean business!

Three little words — trash can lid. My favorite panel – “I can only shed so much.”

Well, that’ll teach the humans not to mess with the bosses.

It’s been five years since Onyx passed, but I’m sure there’s still enough vacuum-resistant fur around to recreate her. Probably under the couch and dresser, where her toys still lurk.

This must be why they hate the vacuum – it isn’t the noise, it’s the loss of their fur-identity!

My cat isn’t afraid of the vacuum — but then again, he doesn’t see it all that often . . .