Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 07, 2015
May 06, 2015
May 08, 2015
Transcript:
Pig: What do you think is the biggest thing you gain as you get older? Is it patience? Perspective? Wisdom?
Pastis: New little hairs that grow out of my ear.
Pig: I was hoping for more.
Aches and pains. Joints that may wish to creak when you get up in the morning. Grey hair and wrinkles (unless you try kidding yourself about aging and use things to remove these). Loss of height.
Recently, I have learned that the hair growing from one’s ears has an affect on one’s hearing. Is the fact that I pluck my ear hairs the reason I’m growing deaf?
More? Who could want more than little hairs growing in strange places? I recently developed a lame knee during a thunderstorm. That was fun. Fluid pressure.
When my hair started turning grey, I said I didn’t care if it turned grey as long as it doesn’t turn loose. sigh Then God’s sense of humor kicked in.And as I have oft repeated here:Grandma said “If you don’t want to get old, you have to die young.”
Best investment of the last 2 decades for me: Ear/Nose hair trimmer. Had to do it since the line between moustache and nose was disappearing and the quick pass with a cigarette lighter wasn’t working real well anymore.
Getting older means we have more time for comics.Between all the hair trimmings and prostate exams.Then there is the enjoyment of the constant flurry of male enhancement ads.Stay thirsty my friends…….yea that’s another problem….constantly having to go……..
Biggest thing you gain? The knowledge that you are smarter and more talented than everyone on TV today.:Seriously, are they all recruited from mental hospitals?
Cartoon-Boy has touched a nerve today. I make more use of tweezers now than I ever did when younger….Yeah, ear-hairs, nose-hairs, unruly eyebrows…. It’s all disgusting.
danfromfreddybeach over 9 years ago
weight
Stan King over 9 years ago
Truth. sigh
Arianne over 9 years ago
Oh, the prostate is way bigger than those little hairs. Don’t worry, Pig… there will be more…
LuvThemPluggers over 9 years ago
Hammer toes and bifocals.
knight1192a over 9 years ago
Aches and pains. Joints that may wish to creak when you get up in the morning. Grey hair and wrinkles (unless you try kidding yourself about aging and use things to remove these). Loss of height.
phylum over 9 years ago
more things I would change if I only knew then what I know now..
oldschool434 over 9 years ago
in reading this strip for years we all have been hoping for more……
arye uygur over 9 years ago
Recently, I have learned that the hair growing from one’s ears has an affect on one’s hearing. Is the fact that I pluck my ear hairs the reason I’m growing deaf?
Brass Orchid Premium Member over 9 years ago
More? Who could want more than little hairs growing in strange places? I recently developed a lame knee during a thunderstorm. That was fun. Fluid pressure.
Plumbob Wilson over 9 years ago
A firm conviction that modern pop music sucks.
juicebruce over 9 years ago
Expect the unexpected :-(
PICTO over 9 years ago
Misanthropy.
whiteheron over 9 years ago
Applause!
whiteheron over 9 years ago
When my hair started turning grey, I said I didn’t care if it turned grey as long as it doesn’t turn loose. sigh Then God’s sense of humor kicked in.And as I have oft repeated here:Grandma said “If you don’t want to get old, you have to die young.”
BlackTie over 9 years ago
All the junk mail from AARP. That starts at about 45
starkeyt62 over 9 years ago
DEBT! Primarily from student loans for my kids.
Plods with ...™ over 9 years ago
I hate those…
BlackTie over 9 years ago
All those kids on my lawn. GET OFF MY LAWN!!
mnn2300 over 9 years ago
Ear hair — That is so true
Rwill over 9 years ago
Ah, the great southerly hair migration.
Stryk428 over 9 years ago
Nose hair is worse.
puddlesplatt over 9 years ago
Bowels….voted # 1
finale over 9 years ago
Best investment of the last 2 decades for me: Ear/Nose hair trimmer. Had to do it since the line between moustache and nose was disappearing and the quick pass with a cigarette lighter wasn’t working real well anymore.
Vet Premium Member over 9 years ago
Getting older means we have more time for comics.Between all the hair trimmings and prostate exams.Then there is the enjoyment of the constant flurry of male enhancement ads.Stay thirsty my friends…….yea that’s another problem….constantly having to go……..
the lost wizard over 9 years ago
At least his are growing out of his ears.
kaffekup over 9 years ago
My wife is always on me to shave my ears – “everyone else does it”. Won’t understand, not everyone else does.
johnschutt over 9 years ago
Hey! Don’t forget the nose!
3pibgorn9 over 9 years ago
Sometimes that’’s all there is.
abbybookcase over 9 years ago
bette davis -getting old is not for sissies-words to live by
BlackTie over 9 years ago
Old man look at my nose hairs, I’m alot like you were
Carl Rennhack Premium Member over 9 years ago
Getting older isn’t bad when I consider the alternative!!
Sherlock Watson over 9 years ago
Biggest thing you gain? The knowledge that you are smarter and more talented than everyone on TV today.:Seriously, are they all recruited from mental hospitals?
ChessPirate over 9 years ago
To be fair, there are things we lose, too; head hair, memory, muscle tone, hearing, eyesight, mobility, patience, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera…
Number Three over 9 years ago
Hopefully the one thing Stephan won’t lose as he gets older is his talent.
xxx
Sisyphos over 9 years ago
Cartoon-Boy has touched a nerve today. I make more use of tweezers now than I ever did when younger….Yeah, ear-hairs, nose-hairs, unruly eyebrows…. It’s all disgusting.
Kind&Kinder over 9 years ago
I don’t know who you are, but I’m standing and applauding. Brilliant!
snomasnayr over 9 years ago
Those little hairs are really brains starting to leak out.
Alexander the Good Enough over 9 years ago
Ah yes, the rewards of getting older, when everything gets bigger, hairier and closer to the ground.
TIMH over 9 years ago
When I was a lad of 23, I saw a combination ear and nose hair clipper and laughed and laughed. Now, at 53, I own one.
claire de la lune. over 9 years ago
Goody!
Ethan the new guy over 9 years ago
I’m not very old, but I’m already getting knee problems. (Sigh)
Timothy Higgins Premium Member over 9 years ago
okay, how about little grey hairs that grow out of your nose?
pearlsfan#1 over 8 years ago
lol