Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for February 29, 2016

Sorry, Wiz, acts of ‘gods’ aren’t included…

Use your dark magic and make him disappear and then fix your house. Jeez, you can activate a volcano for crying out load, but you can’t deal with this?

Another of his spells gone wrong?

Snakes are covered; basilisks not so much.

Giant reptiles are a specific exclusion. See Paragraph 73, subsection b.

Anything that gets into the snake’s mouth will soon be moving to its stomach.

THAT’S the Wizard’s house??!!?

It is impossible for that snake to go into the house like that unless it is two snakes?

I used to think that when you bought home owners insurance it covered everything, turns out it doesn’t…its rather a sad joke that you have main policy, and numerous sub policies and even then it still doesn’t cover everything.

Then again I did think car insurance was insurance you paid that fixed your car when it broke down. The English language can be confusing if you don’t know how things work for real.

Oh, no! Not a basilisk! Don’t look at it!!

OMG!!! I just checked and WE don’t have coverage for this either!! MAAANN!

Always remember, the object of being an insurance company is to avoid paying out any more than is absolutely necessary to stay in business.Like all gambling – the House wins.

Most insurance policies will only cover a gold brick against fire if it is always kept at the bottom in 50 feet of clean water…

The Insurance policy is nothing more than a contract between you and the company and yes there is a vermin exclusion in there. I’d say that’s a vermin – maybe?

Hey, your a wizard! Whay do you need to bother with insurance? Just zap the sucker to another planet.Or to the house of someone ou don’t like (heh)

Let’s just say his magic wand happens to still be in the house, so he is currently unable to zap the snake in any way other than to toss a couple rocks at it (which likely would just make it madder!)

Can’t he use his magic to edit the fine print in the policy?