Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 26, 2018

Now who does Daddy read the Riot Act to – Danae or the spider?

After all these years, men still have to be the ones to kill the spider. Actually, after my daughter moved to another state and got her own place, she texted me one day to say that after much hysterics and screaming, she finally dispatched her first spider. I was so proud of her.

I’m picking up vibes of Calvin and Hobbes here.

Nice to know that she knows she still needs her dad.

My spiders are either left alone or captured and released outdoors. I just don’t have a killer instinct. Now if it were a Giant Mongolian Skunk Spider, then I would call it killer end-stink.

Now, now Danae, there’s no such thing as scary spiders, so calm down…here: let me put this giant happy clown doll on a chair facing your bed to protect you…

I notice that Danae’s jam-jams have a cute little snore word balloon instead of her daytime skull. I don’t think that’s exactly goth chic.

Some people just don’t recognize sarcasm, even if it’s hanging around like a bleep in a bed……

Daddy will know better than to serve those Burritos for dinner next time.

I have been very leery of spiders since watching the Night Gallery episode in the 70s. I have a sneaky suspicion that they can grow to the size of a Shetland pony.

“Boris the Spider….. boom, boom, boom boom, boom, boom, boom…Boris the Spider…….Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom boom”…….

Reference to a higher authority. Now where have I heard that before? Oh, yeah – “You just wait ’til your father gets home!!”