The Buckets by Greg Cravens for November 16, 2018

He probably would! He must be as sick of it as you are, Frank!

I have a landline I never answer anymore. The I.D. box is really busy lately.

Very creative there, Mr. Bunket.

Answer the phone, do not say anything, wait 5 seconds, push “9” and hang up. It’s an automatic “do not call” list. You can also set your phone to use the highest number of rings, robot calls hang up automatically after 3-4 rings. I employ both methods. I love caller ID; if it ain’t in the saved numbers, if I don’t know the name or it has no name, I don’t answer it. And I hardly ever have to erase their messages; they don’t leave them. But it’s still terrible, especially when you’re expecting a call, to have most calls be garbage!

Bunket?

I answer, identifying myself as a representative from the AG’s office, consumer fraud division

I love this. I have to admit though, I did let one home improvement guy do his whole little song and dance and then gave him my ex husband’s address for an appointment.

There is no cure for telemarketing other than utter destruction… which I wholly support.

“Bunket? It’s Bunkum, Bunkum, I tell you!”

This is EXCELLENT!!!

It’s Boo-kay, thank you.

I have a short poem that I change monthly as the land line greeting. I’ve had wrong numbers call back to hear it again. I can hear them laughing as they hang up.

I tell them, The only thing I know about you is that you don’t think the law about the Do Not Call list applies to you. You see then why I wouldn’t hire you? Have a good day.

We rarely answer our landline anymore, we have call-display, which helps…. we only pick up if it’s someone we actually want to talk to. :P