Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for December 03, 2018

Alright, new theory, only some goblins know how to write in really bad English, and Prunella has a translator for her twitter feed.

oh, the oblivious umlaut (I wonder into what blàrt, blárt, blârt, blært, blãrt, blårt, blārt, and bląrt translate)

“Hey unicorn.” How rude. She knows Marigold’s name.

Prunella must use Texpand or something – though how Marigold translates it will always be a bit of a mystery, other than the standard explanation: UNICORN!

If “I am Groot” can mean so many different things, then why not “Blart”?

And here I thought it was all in the context. Dakota has a cute outfit, BTW.

I wouldn’t have thought that Goblinspeak works as well in writing as in oral form

There’s considerable subtext. Also that little pie chart we’re not shown. Oh, great. Now I want pie.

Now this’ll be interesting.

Have we ever seen that hat before?

Phoebe should offer to go along and record it for Dakota’s blog – not that Dakota will appreciate it that much if she wins, but having video of Miss Reed losing a popularity contest to a goblin would be priceless. (Not that Phoebe would ever post it, but it would be a good thing to think about whenever Dakota puts her down.)

I could never get those accent marks! I’ve tried so many key combinations, but I can’t find them!

At least it’s not Trial by Stone.

People may not understand “Blart”, but a “Fart” will grab your attention…

For the contest, they’re going to need an impartial judge who will plot their popularity on a blart chart.

THE GOBLIN QUEEN IZ GONNA CRUSH DAKOTA