Reality Check by Dave Whamond for January 20, 2019

No, dogs don’t rule, but they do drool.

By his expression it seems that he already did them all.

I have never had a dog who knew these rules. Must be the rules for an American Bully Terrier.

7. Start all over again.

I do rule 4 while driving in traffic. If a person is close behind me, i will ease off on the gas a bit. Once they finally get the idea of why the passing lane is called a passing lane, they move to the left to pass. Then, and only then, do I move over to the right lane.

My dog has the rules memorized.

Or if it’s my dog, you sniff every possible location several times before selecting the perfect place, and in the process, anything that distracts your attention necessitates restarting the selection process.

And your owner will put up with all of these as long as you wag tail and act happy to see him come home.

When grandma comes to visit hump her leg the whole time with an occasional break to look at her sadly while shaking the stuffing out of your favorite toy and spraying spit all over her. Grandpa needs a laugh, but do not try this with him or he will kick your keister to Kingdom come.

An epic dump? Make sure you retriever it!!

When going for a walk, sniff the same spot where you urinated on the last walk and wonder who it is from…

As per rule #5, see Drabble today. Funny how that happens sometimes.