Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for March 13, 2019

Take the steel wheels tour !

Looks like a case of stilted development !

Is there any chance I can get stilts with powered wheels?

It’s nice to be up and around these days.

I’m moved.

For the ones who can stand upright and be tall, not the ones who feel downright and be small. BA{LANCE} is like riding an Armstrong bicycle, once you fall, you don’t want to fall again, just win, win, win….

She was 5 foot 6, two fifteen

A beach blonde mama with a streak of mean

She knew how to knuckle and she knew how to scuffle and fight

And the roller derby program said

That she was built like a ’fridgerator with a head

Her fans called her Tuffy, but all her buddies called her Spike

— Jim Croce

I always get about Paris on my stilts. The pic-pockets don’t practice for picking the pocket of a stilt-walker. And at the Louvre, I always have a view of the Mona Lisa…

direct marketing for giraffes

My Favorite Part™ was NOW

curiously, my favorite part (not to be confused with My Favorite Part™) was :

Add 50c West of the Mississippi

Now we know where King Derwin of Didd got his favorite toys!

These are a nice mix of conformity (how everyone looks) and unorthodoxy (how everyone locomotes). And are those two young chaps with the stilts twins? Looks like one of them has some work to do to fill the Height Gap.

Roller rinks, like bowling alleys and pool halls, have changed quite a bit over the decades. Stay away, unless you’ve got a bed-bug sniffing dog and carry a high capacity firearm.

Are there still roller rinks? Maybe there’s still roller derby! Great for boys to watch, even if we couldn’t figure out what the rules were. And roller blades going by my window. That seems to have died out too.

You seldom see people on stilts roller skating.

Back in my teen years when skateboards were popular, Chicago Wheels were THE thing for a good one.

Happy-time stilts: thank goodness. I was afraid my stilts would be partially lacquer-pdipped.///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

You Can’t Get To Heaven On Roller Skates, but you can reach for the stars on stilts.

Sorry about all the mini-stilts. My elbow rested on the keyboard too long.

Where is Happy? Aren’t these Happy’s stilts?

This is the America we need to return to! Make it great again! Everyone on stilts and skates and not a shade darker than tan to be seen anywhere! /s

“50c West of Mississippi” is my new slogan.

Nothing scatalogical here … move along ….

Ahhh, those were the days. Mailorder was king.

I remember that you could order a Lahti L-39 with 20 rounds of armor piercing for under $700. Delivered. They had an ad in Guns & Ammo every month.

All that elbow grease got you down? Feeling too tired from all the turd polishing? Get back to your natural rhythm with the All-New Lacquer Dipping! New and improved space-age formula lets you dip-dip-dip to your lames content! And, what’s more, it’s not just for dingleberries anymore! Try it on a tumor! Try it on a Walnetto! Try it on a goat! Try it on a stilted lover! Your life will never be the same! Cultivate the lame!

now it’s time to dip your dingleberries with lame stilted lovers may your lameness make you a turd polisher

I thought Roller Ball was a stilted movie.

I’m not big on stilts (oh, the irony!); but I’ll buy the skates. Cruise on down to the rink, over by there!

I love what the smooth, responsive action of those skates has done to the front of his pants.