That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 13, 2019

“It doesn’t matter. I just want to go to college to attend games and party.”

“I can’t even make her appear athletic, and I certainly don’t have enough money. I guess she will just be selling flowers on the street.”

Yes, we are here waiting for the restore of Wi-Fi connection.

“Oy, with the vaping pens already, they grow up so fast!”

I was told college is a fountain of knowledge where students go to drink…

You know, this whole school thing: it just doesn’t add up. I mean, that’s my problem, it doesn’t seem real; when I put the numbers together, they just won’t become a sum thing!

The neighbors get painted by Kandinsky. Who do we get? Some schmuck named Korin.

Stop kvetching Grandmom. Just sit up straight and pose for the painting.

“How can I tell her the scholarship list is already out and she’s not even on it?”

very contemporary, Mr Melcher! Nice job.

“Ok….grandma needs a new dress. with 50 polka dots per square yard…how many yards of cloth would she need to make a dress that has 500 dots on it? Take your time “

Grandma is making a farting noise with her hand.

Wow. This strip has no lead time at all?

Not that I’m complaining – I like it.

However, my (own) ACT scores gave my college professors greater expectations than were warranted. I just scraped by.

“Aw. This is cute; ‘Tell Tale Heart’. Let me run this over to that Poe fellow for a proof-read.”

Where did you say this pot came from?

Little Svetlana puts her new creativity training to work on Grandma’s tax return.

Mrs. Moronavich, lamenting teaching her kids to read when they could be making money in the Russian porn industry.

“I’m normally a nice person, but if you don’t get that paparazzi paintbrush outta my face I’m gonna smack you into next week!”

It’s a beautiful piece of art, but I wonder 1) why is the older woman so sad / disinterested/ bored? 2) how, exactly, does the man’s belt, over a shirt that’s outside his pants, work?

Looks like a very young child. Early addition. You can count on your fingers for that. I know I did.

My, that was quick.

The Associated Press reported, "Fifty people, including Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin, were charged Tuesday in a scheme in which wealthy parents allegedly bribed college coaches and other insiders to get their children into some of the nation’s most elite schools.

“If she recites her multiplication tables over again, I am going to do something horrible!”

Such a disappointment these kids are….I’ve had it! Off to the Gulag they go!

Oh great! Now her mother says she won’t be home for another month.

Mabrndt filed his post as usual about 2 hours ago. I don’t see it now along with my comment. It is not there now. All his past posts and profile are missing. Comments anyone?

Grandma feels bad that she can’t help candy fill out her college application, because she can’t read, but candy will get in because grandma, saved a bundle of cash.

I declare, “Priceless” today is a hotbed of cynicism ! I am shocked and appalled! LOL!!

Steve Melcher’s offense is probably that he disparaged a living person who is not Donald Trump. You don’t see this happening to Non Sequitur or Two Party Opera.