Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for August 28, 2019

Along the north fence is good, too.

“We’ll show THEM who’s truly an invasive species!”

Aha. Just what the ancient astronaut theorists have always suspected. Weed creatures from outer space planning to take over the earth!

Don’t worry, the yard owners are already planning to weed out the invaders.

Dandelions – the most misunderstood, maligned, yet useful herb and, yes, it is an herb but most see it as just a weed.

My favorite “flower” when I was a little kid. I used to pick them for my Mom all the time when I was in first grade!

“Our new stronghold will enable us to take over the whole town! Ha, ha, ha!”

I live next to a small lake that drains into the town’s water supply. Whatever chemicals I put on my lawn, I wind up drinking a week later. Also in the spring, we are overrun with goslings.

So I am very reluctant to use chemical warfare on weeds or insects even to the point of using fertilizer sparingly. Consequently, my lawn has little grass and mostly weeds. However when I mow it, it looks nice. Also since the plants that DO thrive there do so because they are adapted to the natural environment. So I don’t have to do a lot of maintenance on them.

Mostly I have clover and moss. The moss I can combat with lime (AKA, calcium carbonate or chalk) if the geese ingest that, they’ll get stronger bones. I’m OK with clover: it’s softer than grass to walk on and the bees like it.

Before we knew about the dangers, we could just Roundup the usual suspects.

As long as it’s green, I don’t care.

In August the weeds ALWAYS win!

My grandmother, along with many immigrant women from Europe, picked, cooked and ate dandelions from the embankments of the expressways in Chicago. From a good ½ mile away you could see women with stockings rolled up at the knee bent over harvesting the greens. My father said that the dogs helped make the dandelions more tender. I refused to eat any.

Where’s Creepy Charlie (as my kids used to call it)?

Where’s Creepy Charlie? (as my kids used to call it)

Isn’t that grass leading the charge? Or is he the “wrong” kind of grass?

Ah. Ah. AAAh choooooo

If dandelions were not as plentiful and easy to grow, Big Pharma would be making a fortune on it and the FDA would require it to be sold by prescription only.

They are formidable opponents. We just went to war with them yesterday!

The grasslings don’t have a chance, no offense!

I recognize them …

Where’s the cannabis?

“Ah, boss. I just checked the shed and they 55 gallon drums of weed-b-gon.”

bad seeds, the whole lot…

Dandelions were once grown as a commercial crop, particularly during World War II. The “milky” substance from the stems was used to produce a rubber substitute and in some areas the young leaves were harvested as a non-ration points vegetable.