Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for January 07, 2025

The last straw for Alex

tells me he is sorry for many things in his life actually

Phideaux, on the other hand, thinks straws should be mandatory at all meals and several times a day in between.

Alex is sorry now, but just wait until he introduces straws AND peas to the evening meal.

Alex regets teaching Phideaux how to blow. Can he whistle too?

Good morning, Ballard Dears!

Phideaux, like any four year old, knows that if something is funny once, it only gets funnier with repetition.

Phideaux misunderstood Lauren Bacall’s quote, You just put your lips together and blow.

If only he hadn’t brought out the whole box of straws …

A decision he has lived to regret.

Paper or plastic? It’s so hard to choose

Phideaux can never pick which one to use

He’ll pick up the straws

just using his paws,

then blowing wrappers like airborne refuse.

Wait until Phideaux hears about spitballs.

I do wonder how Alex managed to train Phideaux how to blow. Is there a training manual?

TODAY’S LIMERICK.

Never have lunch with a dog,

Their habits are too much to log.

They won’t have a bath,

They bark at the staff,

And they drink Beaujolais from the bog!

Alex is sorry….but not his dog……..

The odds of this happening were a-straw-nomical.

Alex may soon have a straw dog.

oh man… does that bring back good memories!!

Dogs cannot manipulate their lips well enough to use a straw. That’s why their snouts are so long. :) :?

Taught the nieces and nephews that you could only do that at Pizza Hut, and we did clean up after ourselves when we went. A few years later brudder took them to a fast food place that had straws in wrappers. When he asked them why they didn’t blow the wrappers off the response was, “Well Aunt says you can only do that at Pizza Hut.”

Alex should be happy it’s not spitballs… yet.

Good evening Balladeers!

wow, alex thinks to himself, straws really suck…