Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for May 25, 2020

Yes, that’s why we are all home now, it’s a conspiracy, look it up, I’m pretty sure somehow or another you can support that bologna.

I guess it is sad to say that the accidents are where you are.

That’s because you spend more time at home than anywhere else

I’m just here at home…..by accident.

It used to be the backseat of a Ford at the drive-in.

The most common place for accidents IS the home especially when that home belongs to Tim Taylor.

Tim Taylor…the Tool Fool….

NO1 NO! MOVING IS WHAT CAUSES THE ACCIDENTS! Moving from one place to another, moving the coffee cup, moving the magazines that are under something. . .

Since it’s Cosmo’s house, you don’t need to move.

There was an old bit back in the early years of SNL “Statics say a man is mugged every ten seconds in new york, and we’re going to interview that man”

I wonder which will be greater worldwide, – a spike in the number of births or the number of divorces – once this pandemic’s stay-at-home phase is over.

…or, just stop going to his home.

One of the interesting things about being 70 is noticing some “jokes” are at least 50 years old.

I always liked the idea of buying the house that the small plane crashed into, I mean what are the odds that something like that will ever happen again ? :-)