The Barn by Ralph Hagen for May 26, 2020

Butter my butt and call me a biscuit. (Or something like that.)

“A cat can have kittens in the oven but that don’t make ’em buscuits!”

Nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs. You look like you got rode hard and put away wet.

As slick as spit on a doorknob……that’s what that was Rory!

“How are you?”

“I’m just as fine as paint.”

I’m feeling lower than a snake’s belly in a wagon rut.

So long, Screwy, see you in St. Louis.

Slicker’n catshit on linoleum!

Ate by a bear and crapped over a cliff.

Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit! All hat and no cattle. That dog won’t hunt. Speed on brother, hell ain’t half full. Never eat at a place called Mom’s, never play cards with a man named Doc, and never sleep with anyone whose problems are worse than your own.

Never eat at a restaurant where the chef is skinny!

Guessing that being pulled through a knot hole backwards.. soreness, would depend a lot on what was being pulled

Knot a Sheep Shank? ☺

Y’all are sillier than a lamb in a comic strip!

if you run out of ideas try thishttps://store.southernthing.com/#&gid=1&pid=1

Shakier than a chair missing one leg.

Busier than a cat in a litter box!