Rubes by Leigh Rubin for August 06, 2020

That ring is mondo heavy.

At least he doesn’t have to take his shoes off when going through security.

FLY YOU FOOL’S

One doesn’t simply carry one’s luggage into Mordor Airlines.

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/bilbos-baggage-pxgkhjsqw7m

“On the set of Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit, a casting agent has been sacked for refusing to cast a Briton of Pakistani origin as a hobbit extra. Is this racism, or a commitment to accuracy? Or is it, perhaps, both?

It is hard, in the original text of the The Lord of the Rings saga, to find justification for a nonCaucasian hobbit, or a black Elf, or a white Uruk-hai. Was J. R. R. Tolkien racist?

By the standards of today, almost certainly. The very notion of a world inhabited by segregated races of Men, Elves, Dwarves[sic], hobbits and fearsome Orcs has too many conceptual parallels with the later apartheid of his native South Africa for comfort."

I never read or watched LotR (I prefer science fiction over fantasy) but even if he described the characters to the extent of skin color, etc, most lobsters are tan. Many beetles are black. Honey bees are all tan/black. Armadillos are either tan or grey. Possums are grey with white faces. Raccoons are either brown or grey as the prominent color.

I.e. there’s a LOT of species of animals that have little or no variation in color. So saying that the hobbits were all white, is that racism or simply that there’s not a lot of variance in skin color in them?

And if the dwarfs didn’t like the hobbits or the humans didn’t party hard with the elves, was it racism or simply that they were different species? Do we go out for drinks with bonobos? Do killer whales help little old lady seals cross the street? Do cats raise orphaned baby mice as their own?

I’m asking this in all seriousness. Was it really racial or was it simply that some species don’t get along with some other species and that some species don’t have a lot of variation in size/color/other defining characteristics?

THIS is why the Eagles wouldn’t take you…

I hear Sauron Airways have great cookies. Occasional orc bother here and there but great cookies nonetheless

Gandalf the black?

Should not have tried to save airfare by packing Merry and Pippen.

?

It shouldn’t take 3 cases to pack light.. a handbag would easily carry a flashlight and perhaps a set of fresh batteries

That ring weighs a lot, you know.

Too much luggage. You shall not pass!

He’s not very Merry about that. He’s going to have to change his hobbits when packing for a journey.

Boy, have you got a lot of free time on your hands

He should learn to pack from his least favorite relatives, the Carryonville Bagginses.

He’ll be OK. He has a professional who can shrink his baggage.