Rubes by Leigh Rubin for September 08, 2020

If this were British, he would say she didn’t come to a full stop, which would be funnier. But then, I’m not a fan of period pieces.

Her age is her excuse. My generation called them periods or decimal points; the kids just call them “dots.”

She would go close to fitting a baseball team in a car with that much room.

I never knew such wide width cars were being manufactured.

You should see what happens at the colon.

She might not be a grammar.

Remember when cars had bench seats in the front?

Steering wheel’s on the wrong side for a full stop.

For most ppl it’s a question mark

Good thing it wasn’t an interrobang.

I was doing tech support and trying to assist someone with setting up email in Outlook Express (many years ago.)

In Outlook Express, when you enter the email address, if it’s not valid (if it’s not in the form of xxxxxxx@yyyyyy.zzzzzz, with the @ and then at least one dot after it) it’d pop up a warning. This helped with typing in xxxxxxx@yyyyyy,zzzzzz or xxxxxxx#yyyyyy.zzzzzz, etc by mistake. I told her “type in janedoe at emailaddress dot com and click next”, which she did.

The next screen is the server names and I told her “type in mail dot emailaddress dot com and click next” and she said “it says the server name doesn’t appear to be valid.” (I.e. it’s not in the form of xxxxxxxx.yyyyyyy.) So I asked her to re-type it. Same thing. “Type in em…a…i…el…dot…e…em….(etc.)” After several attempts, I asked her to tell me each and every key she hits on the keyboard.

“Em…a…i…el…dee…oh…tee…e……….”

smack

What gets me is that she typed a period in the email address when I told her “dot” and I spelled out every bleeping letter in the words but didn’t spell out “dee oh tee” so why is she now spelling it out?!?! I had to tell her to “type em…a…i…el. Now hit the period. Now type in el…em…a…(etc.)”

The grammar police only stop people periodically. Sometimes they take them in for questioning.

Her excuse was that she was on her period…

Much better than telling her she missed a period.

Can you imagine under these circumstances, how difficult it would be to drive in Cambridge, England.

she failed to come to a full stop, period…