The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for October 01, 2020

The bellhop will fly your luggage to your room promptly.

Shoes must be removed before entering the room… if you hand over your ruby slippers, I can store those safely for you.

I guess she’ll just have to get a bucket of ice and let it melt.

Dorothy, pay no attention to the witch behind the counter. If you only had a brain, you’d try her sister’s place across the street, where you’d be addressed as “my pretty” – by the Wicked Witch of the Best Westin.

You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.

Should have gone to Best Western.

Wait till she finds that check out is at 7am.

Don’t mind the mess in the room, looks like a tornado might have hit it.

And don’t mind the evil looking-winged staff….

And what’s the Toto charge?

And on your pillow when they turn down your sheets?

A nice, shiny, crisp APPLE!

Click your red shoes three times…..after you sneak a bottle of water and splash the hotel keeper…

Witches Be Loco!

Now that’s a horse of a different color…

And the vibrating bed only takes Canadian quarters.

Do they offer broom service?

Toto is wanted in the kitchen. He won’t be returning in a form you will recognize.

Pay no attention to the hotel manager behind the curtain.

“I will get your deposit my pretty”

Starring Paris Hilton.