Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal by Zach Weinersmith for October 24, 2020

Would it upset you little metaphysical world if I told you someone has stolen my glass?

But it’s completely full. Half with the liquid and half with air.

Half empty if I’m drinking. Half full if you’re pouring.

….it is twice the volume as needed…

Ear poison.

“One man’s meat…?”

Someone needs a hug.

Wrong orifice.

I’ve long known that seeing the glass half empty isn’t the only way to express pessimism. Apart from the above example, there’s “The glass is actually completely empty; it’s painted to throw us off.”

That glass is overdesigned, if it holds 50% more than requirements. :)

Should be ear worms.

Tell me, really, is this funny?

The water in the glass is at a median level.