Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for March 18, 2021

14% cologne?

Those records should have been frozen.

No magic? Not related to Frosty, then.

I would have expected 98% precipitation…

Turns out he’s not all white, but a mixed breed…

Check for yellow spots.

where is the top hat?

How insulting.

Now we knows why doggies likes to lick you.

Toilet water or Eau de Toilette?

Now he’s PONDering about what to to with this information he just has sOAKed up. What if he carrot live with that? Will his last cry be “Rosepuddle”? What’s it all about with this COALescence? Aaah! So what! Water is water!

What percent plastic? Over 400 million tons of plastic are produced each year. Plastic doesn’t biodegrade; it breaks down into smaller and smaller pieces of plastic. Microplastics (any plastic less than 5mm or 0.2" in size) are now found in fresh water, sea water, drinking water, waste water and rain water.

Sooooo, I’m a drip?

Oh, well…we can’t all be Olaf, Babycakes

He read that analysis, and it made his blood run cold.

3% coal? His ancestry dates back to the dinosaurs!

I’d have thought 100% frozen sky water.

What about dog urine?

Free Will: 0%

Well that explains the blue birth mark on my side.

Snow comes from the sky.

Toilet water? They better check their their pipes

No dog pee??!

And to add insult to injury, some kid is going to come around and kick him right in the snowballs!

100% gone by spring

At least it doesn’t include sewage.