Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for May 12, 2021

All of them have, except for one; the iPhone ate.

“My wife asked me why I wore my gun in the house. I replied ‘Decepticons’. She laughed, I laughed, the toaster laughed, I shot the toaster.”

I giggle at the anti-covid-vaxxers who believe that Bill Gates conspiracy of putting tracking devices in the vaccines. Why would anyone invest in that when your cell phones track you already? Between GPS and cookies, they know exactly where you’ve been and what you’ve been searching, viewing, and reading…. all WITHOUT a vaccine.

Not to forget the other smart devices.

Why is blue-shirt wearing what appear to be Crocs and stereotypical blind-guy-from-1980s-movie glasses? Is that a common style somewhere in the world right now?

Secretly?

And they’re secretly taking videos of you too.

Your TV even tracks your habits….the internet is a bitter-sweet invention…as for Siri and the other “voices” on devices, they listen in on your life and can hear you….I disconnected mine and shoved it in a closet. I’m done!

“Wait. You didn’t hear that. I am not the ‘droid you’re looking for.”

Borrow from Daddy’s Home much?

We have the CIA’s former director’s assurance that the government isn’t monitoring our cell phones,. Oh, right.

alexa, are you listening to me right now? ask siri

What would Alexander Bell do? Switch over to a Motorola?

" And from Artisan the 63rd Richard, we proceed to Clarke the 64th David rather than resorting to toxic cigarette smoke signals." – Heather Miller’s Sudbury Communications Tourist Guide

How do you expect Siri to respond if she’s not listening?