That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for May 05, 2021

The captain was really ticked off when the repair crew told him his ship’s extended warranty had expired.

New listing, boat for sale.

All I’m saying, Ahab, is that this is why you need a good boat insurance: so that the next time you’re in a hit and run, you’re not on the hook for all the repairs

It was that sort of neighborhood – all the guys had old beat up boats up on cinder blocks in the front yard that they were overhauling in the hopes of selling

“Get me someone who can actually captain a ship, the schooner the better!”

“Last thing I heard, the Captain announces ‘sunbathers off the port bow!’”

So I was thinking that I could put one of those new-fangled steam engines on the side here, an’ maybe a tinted windshield an’ some purple Underglow…

The captain told the ship’s mutt “Heel!” but the boat did instead…

“Cap’n, I just got off the horn with some cat named Stevens, and he said some longer boats are coming to get us. Oh, and some writer called Lightfoot wanted to know the name of the ship, so I gave him my father-in-law’s name, Edmund Fitzgerald.”

When the tide goes out, ship happens.

“I’m not drunk! I was parked here and that dock ran under my ship”

This is probably one of those ships that lower to let the handicapped get off.

Yep, that whole starboard fender’s gonna need replacin’.

“I told you, ten cannons on the port side and ten cannons of the starboard side, not twenty cannons of the port!

He regrettably paid quite a lot/ for what he’d been told was a yacht/and the seller had flown/ to places unknown/ leaving him and his “yacht “ to rot.

The idea of naming vessels after famous physicians died aborning with the H.M.S. Lister.

Roll another one. Just like the other one.

Note to self: “On next voyage, Cannonballs should be stored in boxes and not left to roll around freely.”

Interesting, that was once an A-Hole, and now this.

The Captain was trying to show his girlfriend a closer look of the Italian coast.

The Captain decided the Alaskan coast line could use some of his crude oil cargo.

The cruise ship passengers afflicted with the Nora Virus were ordered to use the head on the port side of the boat.

The original design of the Titanic had watertight compartments on only the starboard side of the boat. (This test led to them eliminating the watertight compartments completely)

“Okay, you blew it at the Suez Canal, and we decided to give you a second chance at the helm. But this is it – you’re outta here!”

The parallel parking assist needs a slight adjustment.

Unexpected complications forced cancellation of the Plus-Model Show’s dinner cruise event.

It’s the brand-new & improved Trump Party Boat!

Notice how it’s run aground and heels to the extreme, even at the dock?

It’s never going to sail until it gets on an even keel … and that is not ever gonna happen!

“Idiot, the sign says small vessel parking only.”

It’s for moments like these that tug boats were invented

Don’t worry, cap’n, it’ll buff out.

Making repairs in the shipyard or Figures at work in a harbour: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Henri_Adolphe_Schaep_-_Het_maken_van_reparaties_in_de_scheepswerf.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. File history has strip coloration image.

https://www.askart.com/artist/Hendrik_Adolf_Schaep/11068090/Hendrik_Adolf_Schaep.aspx 

has info, or links that point to more info, about this artist (again if truncated, can be read in full for free on Fridays), perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the title URL. First work by him used here.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2700 (May 4, 2021) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

I was so drunk. So that was where I parked the boat…..

There appears to be some confusion with nautical jargon in the comments. We are looking at the bow of the ship, so it is careened on its Starboard side for repairs/cleaning on the Port side of the hull bottom.

On this episode of “This Old Ship”, Bob Villa boasts that the ship is in amazing condition for its age; while, Norm Abrams decides to demolish the hull down to the keel.

The color palette in this reminds me of film noir and old photos. Black and white is underused

The cargo that Ahab hauls/ is aimed at American malls/ but what kind of Skipper/ would load up his Clipper / with Chinese-made bowling balls ?/// And then, with temerity, sail / straight into the teeth of a gale/ while down in the hold/ his cargo has rolled/ from starboard to port gunwale ? That /// Well, you know the rest of the tale/ for by now it’s grown terribly stale/ you can do what you likes/ tis the sea rolls the strikes/ and there’s no way a man can prevail..///The cabin boy only survived/ and to flourish he somehow contrived/ you can see him today/ at the “lanes” by the bay/ setting pins for the newly arrived…

The captain’s legs were of unequal length, so he didn’t notice when they ran aground.

The SHIP of STATE, after the last-passed President got through steering it. We can all see what a TERRIFIC, BEST CAPTAIN EVER, he really was.

Oh $hit

Biden attempts to help the shipping industry by giving a few trillion dollars in gold.

I TOLD you we needed more speed to jump the piers!

First we have the Suez Canal fiasco, and now this. Let’s stick to trucking goods.

Ship that is a ship. Boats are submarines.