Betty by Gary Delainey and Gerry Rasmussen for October 11, 2021

“Alexa, show me how to do this.” “Sorry, I don’t have hands.”

Before I answer your question I need to verify your identity. Please tell me your bank password.

the digital assistant is good at two things, alarm clocks and checking the weather. Sometimes we ask it to make odd ball noises.

I have three organic assistants who manage my mornings; although one of them sleeps in, the other two want breakfast around 4:30 am. I’m generally awake by then anyway.

I ask mine to make the sounds of really pleasurable sex, or would if I had one, which is why I don’t.

There’s always YouTube.

Aw come on lady…talk to your husband and help him out. It’s not as if you have something pressing to do.

I don’t use a digital assistant, I have my phone. I love it when I cuss at a game or something, and my phone speaks up and says something like “I’m sorry, I didn’t understand you”.

Really?? Why were “you” listening in the first place?

One of the best features of my Apple Watch is that the alarm works by tapping my wrist, not blasting a noise to bother everyone else.

Has anyone else found Betty herself to be very unpleasant lately? I find myself not wanting to read “Betty” now. I find it has a certain ugliness.