Reality Check by Dave Whamond for December 03, 2021

Levity is the opposite of gravity.

Yeah, it cracks you UP!

When for god’s sake will he discover that little umbrella which the Coyote uses to protect himself from falling boulders?

Nose tells Newton: “Pick on someone you’re own size!”

Now, if he had discovered levitation, he would have something powerful.

At first glance, I thought he was discovering hacky sack.

When he ate the apple, he discovered a cavity.

And after he ate it, he discovered depravity.

And then he sat under the fig tree and discovered fig newtons

Newton discovers his nose is too big.

I am still pissed that he discovered calculus at 16.

Little known fact that Newton, soon after the apple hit his nose, invented the door stop mounted on a spring. My late cat Louis used to love playing with it.

So you’re telling me that in discovering levity, he never realized the gravity of the situation?

It cored him off guard.

Then he wrote about it on a bathroom wall and discovered graffiti.

Geesh! All those physics classes and it turned out Einstein did a better job of it.

Was he a member of the Mystic Knights of the Oingo Boingo?

well well well

From whose perspective?