Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 24, 2022

No wonder his dialog was so stilted!

On #FB00444, about dinosaurs with “proportionally tiny arms [that] had some sort of function.”

They functioned well enough to grip onto prey but not well enough to help their friends (if they had any!) move house!!

Throw a dark side on him, volah and the Grim Reeper’s number comes up.

…the damp season in Froglandia is something to behold…

…stilts prevent chigger bites when collecting drying jackfruit…

…and ghosts are attracted to the barely ripened jack pods…

…(once too ripe the ghosts tend to go away)…

…you can catch these ghosts I’m put them in a Mason jar…

…shaking them is fun…

…and they keep longer in this semi-gasous form…

…and it stops your ghost from entering your chigger bite…

…simply rinse the jar after the ghost is gone…

…to collect the ghost fertilizer…

…which helps the low lying jack fruit inherit that ghost like aftertaste…

…like Fresca with gin…

…that teenagers so well enjoy…

A new meaning to shake a tail but I see no feathers… he goes to great heights to impress his beloved…bringing jackfruit to woo her with! But the horsey flies won’t leave him alone…..they’re out to get him and his dried up fruit…but…..by the time he reaches his destination, the horsey flies will have infested all that remains in his sticky, gooey pocket…ew

Stilts have to be hard enough to use without a tail added. And assassins parasailing in? Wow. Scary Sunday funnies.

The stilts throw the dogs off the trail, and cost the trackers time in locating the next step impression. Thus, paranormal means are required for successful tracking. Being able to locate the subject instantly by simple psychic awareness of their attached ephemeral tail, rather than following forensic clues left in the mundane environment, is essential for speedy apprehension of targets.

HER opening was, “Have you got it?” “Not sure what you mean,” I replied. She began to explain, “I’m looking for Lucifer Branch, Private Investigator, and you are he. I hired you some time ago, to procure information of details of the operations of a Mr. Godreau. Have you got it?” “Sorry. You’ve got the wrong guy.” This was giving me the heebie-jeebies. “Lucifer Branch. Your friends call you Lucky. Your mother named you Lucifer because she said you were destined to upset the powers that be. You contracted to provide a service, and have been paid accordingly, three hundred dollars per day. Check your bank app, on your phone, in your inside breast pocket.” And there it was. Not much gets by me, but I suddenly have a phone that opens for my face and there is a banking app that says I have three hundred and thirty thousand dollars. “I expect both your itemized expense report and the information, if you could be so kind.” I knew she was trouble when I saw her, but this was above and beyond. I don’t know who put her on my tail, but she had a good grip on it. But the pocket full of jack was nice, if I could live to spend it.

Teresa, Teresa, Teresa.

If you follow the wisdom of Homer Simpson, you CANNOT be the Biggest idiot ever …

but you could be the Biggest idiot so far

Take a walk on the wild side

And all the colored ghosts said, Doo do doo do doo do do doo…

Paranormals for sale … 2 for the price of 1 at the Bathmat Factory …! Get ‘em before they are jackfruied up …!

Lord of the (Circus) Rings

Therein hangs a tail.

…surprise, surprise, surprise, that’s not my tail either…

Paranormal Assassins are relentless!

Even a stilt-walking guy with a tail seems ill-fated. No amount of dried jackfuit will save his sorry tail-side.

If the Paranormal Assassin don’t get you, the orangutan, the Jungle Man, will! It’s an arboreal sure bet. Stilt-walking across SE Asian and Pacific lands is almost as foolish as galoshlessness….