The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for August 31, 2022

Came up through a crack (in the earth of course)

I have heard that if you use a Ouija board while watching old television situation comedies you can summon the ghost of Isabel Sanford.

Oh, no, wait. That’s a Weezie board.

That’s a devil-may-care attitude.

I thought I smelled something.

Wow! You sure don’t know what my game is.

“Devil’s in the details!

“Oh, that smell is Brimstone. I thought it was…. Oh, never mind.”

Don’t make satan the butt of your joke.

Doesn’t that just frost your flakes when that happens????

There will be heck to pay.

wow, now he’s probably mad as he.ll…

As kids we played with the board all the time and had seances …but one time, after I was married, I got so spooked and scared, I gathered it up and threw it in the garbage….never again, I tell you, NEVER again!

What did you think would happen, playing with the candles, the pentagram, and the Ouija board? Wearing hooded robes, especially?

Watch out for the attachments on that spam. Ain’t much use bathin’ a skunk.

Now that he’s there, you better offer him a drink or a sacrifice.

Could it be…..SATAN????

Doesn’t look orange enough to be Trump…

And now he’ll make you a wedgie board.

Say, while you’re here, can you put the cork back in the wine bottle?

Early Christian Inquisition bible authors.

No problem, i’ll just devour your souls now instead of waiting.