Close to Home by John McPherson for July 01, 2023

Roscoe i recommend biting him in the butt.

Neat trick. He could become rich by being able to teach dogs to do that. I’m sure MANY owners would love for their dogs to do that for them.

Must be a field dog…

Time for Roscoe to run away.

From the look on his fsce, Roscoe’s going to get ‘pushy’.

Psst!!! Roscoe! Take a selfie!

I’d check my shoes before putting them on if I was that guy.

I saw a dog doing this on some news show. I think it was on a riding mower though.

When ever I see “ROSCOE” it brings back memories of working at Grumman Data Systems. Only system programmers were allowed to use TSO, as application programmers we had ROSCOE.

Remote OS Conversational Operating Environment (ROSCOE). Online environment similar to TSO.Includes the scripting language ROSCOE Programming Facility (RPF) that is similar to REXX/CLIST.

Originally developed by Applied Data Research in the 1970s.

We affectionately referred to it as the

Redundant Obsolete Senile Catatonic Operating Environment.

About time dogs start contributing to the family that feeds them! Sleep and eat, go for a walk, that’s all they do.

Lawnmower Pro Tip:

There’s a secret about lawnmowers of which most homeowners are not aware.

If you turn them upside down, they become personal Helicopters! It’s certainly a test of how long you can hang on, but hey… personal Helicopter!

— your friends at Pro Tips

Cruelty to animals….and there are people who treat their pets horribly.

This one’s a working mutt…..works for treats. Who’s a good boy?

Roscoe, quick, run off to the Pickles comic, (and you’ll be blindly fawned over by cmerb)

And then there’s all your neighbor witnesses!

There is now an ad on the radio that says If your dog could mow you lawn, he would…then it tells you to reward him with the dog food in ad.

That’s silly. Animals are much more trustworthy than humans…

You’re right almighty master and food provider. Why don’t you just take a nice cool nap there in the shade. …I watched Sling Blade last night. Biscuits and mustard. mmmmm.

My dog does a fair job on the mower but I can’t get him to use the weed eater.

I sense a crime scene approaching. A mangled mower with a mutilated homeowner with a seemingly innocent looking pup with sad eyes

I’m not sure what the SPCA is gonna do about this, after all he is a working breed.

There was an old joke I heard told by Flip Wilson. In the old days, the ice man drove his horse-drawn cart through the city while he shouted “Ice! Ice for sale!”.

While the ice man was taking a block of ice up to a third floor apartment, a passing man was startled to hear the horse muttering to himself, “All day long. Drag this blasted cart.”

“Hey, you can talk!”

“Well, don’t tell anybody or he’ll make me shout ‘Ice! Ice for sale!’ on top of everything else I have to do.”

BITE HIM, R0SCOE!!! Remember: say what you will about the former failed president, but animal abuse was FINALLY made illegal under him!The law is on your side!

Snip his hammock strings. :)

I don’t know how mulch mower abuse he can take.

Win some, lose some…

He’s taxing a dog’s unwavering loyalty, “man’s best friend” qualities and begging for an almost certain law suit from the SPCA.! ;-p

Hey, Roscoe, call PETA instead of the SPCA. PETA will always believe the animal over the human.