Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for January 26, 2024

The lights dim. “Oh well, too late now.”

You could sell it on ebay.

Maybe for that guy in Alabama. (Too soon?)

Suggestion: Rather than nitrogen, use helium. Then if he has any last words, they would sound hilarious and give everyone a good laugh.

On a brighter note, I just passed by the refectory. Your last meal looks delicious.

Ouch

Thats my lawyer!

Oh – that is SO cruel!

Probably a dog. (Stay)

One of the old skit comedy shows, maybe the Smothers Brothers, had something similar. (Phone rings in execution chamber:) Executioner: “Oh, governor…..yes, yes….. yes, I’ll tell him.” (turns to man in electric chair). “Only foolin’!”

Perhaps, instead of execution, convicted murderers should have to listen to the Barney theme song or “Baby Shark” while watching unending repeats of “The Teletubbies”. Too cruel?

Said the attorney for Alan Miller…

Look around you: who else is in a cell on death row now?

Not funny

Juries are supposed to convict only when the evidence is overwhelming, “beyond a reasonable doubt.” I think that it would wonderfully concentrate juries’ minds on this if they were told that, should the execution take place and later evidence show that the conviction or penalty was wrong, they (and maybe the prosecutor) would themselves be put on trial for manslaughter.