Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 01, 2024

P4: What’s next is “Emily C. Lover”

P4 “Clambake.”

Milford and those associated with Milford never lose.

P 4: “… well, first, I gotta use the ladies room and then I’m gonna grab some dinner…”

“Oooh…mmmm…a couple hours in the locker room showers, maybe.

Where do I start… other than the absurdity that Emimiliy would win a LPGA tournament (or championship) after being on the links full-time for a year?

The Milford Star is not sending a reporter to cover the LPGA championship unless it’s in Milford. That would break a small-town newspaper’s annual budget.

Second, the LPGA did decide to give press credentials to Patrick Finley, he’s not going to be allowed on the course for a trophy presentation (unless he was a photographer).

Third, Emimily or whatever we’re calling her would be corralled into a conference into a press room, not answering questions on the course like it’s a high school football game.

My head hurts so much from shaking it… I’ll have to come up with my other WTF points in a bit…

P4.5- We’re off to Hawaii for the nationals, then Austrailia, then wing over to London to party with Mick and the Stones. You guys are invited too. Where’d you get this jacket?

Holy crap! What happened to Patrick’s fingers? Did he get them caught in the elevator doors as it was moving? And speaking of moving, you best get moving and read today’s Mopped Up Thorp.

moppedupthorp wordpress com/2024/07/01/dirty-tactic/

They will have to purchase a turntable to play those silver records they won.

There are second- and third-tier women’s golf tours in the US; there’s no reason that this WPGL couldn’t be a local tour.

Mimi wins a golf tournament, and the girl’s softball team wins a state title.

Next week, Gil will be found sitting in his care in a garage filled with carbon monoxide due to his shortcomings as a coach.

The entire golf tournament was two strips? Fewer opportunities for embarrassing gaffes about sports I suppose.

And it looks like their recording of “The WPGL Dowe Championship Shuffle” has been certified Platinum. Nice job ladies!

P2 was supposed to say “I’m a familiar. The dictionary defines that as a demon attached to a witch.”

Patrick from the Star is all set to uncover the biggest LPGA scandal since lesbians discovered sliced bread… Emily CLOVER is… MEEMEE THORP… [GASP!]

Golly gee, what’s up with MILFord suddenly becoming the home of champions? State Champion Inma Rimchu, all-world Hot Rod, the girls’ softball team, now MeMe. Must be something in the water. Next thing we know, the youngest Thorp spawn will be tearing up the D&D circuit.

Erika is a Homewrecker

Henry must owe Patrick Finley money.

P4- “Well, with the $20 first place prize money I can buy myself a golf glove.”

well nice seeing you pat finlay i guess you will appear again next year

yes im familiar with sweet oyster which is my real reward besides this cheap trophy

henry had to the golf quick because he has a thirty day misdirect coming up on a milford bocce ball scandal

P 4 (Mimi Clover): “…because she kept my idiot kids entertained this week so I could concentrate on golf…”

She went back to maiden name because it’s hard “ to live up to the thorp name”.

C-Lover took first place out two players