Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for March 13, 2025

of course – but no need for it now since FB is solely for that purpose anyway

That is too often why people are on social media.

“Mommy … Mommy. Look, Mommy. Look see what I’m doing, Mommy. MOMEEEE!”

What Happens When You Learn From The University Of Facebook

(The front page of today’s newspaper features the story about 50 million Facebook accounts being hacked. The headline mentions the number. As I’m tidying up the newspapers, a group of teenagers look at the headlines, and then one says, in complete seriousness…)

Teenager #1: “I didn’t even know there were 50 million people in the world!”

Teenager #2: “Yeah, I didn’t know it was that much!”

(I had to turn away to stop myself from laughing!)

New Facebook Recruitment Techniques

My other half works as a team leader at a highly popular family theme park in the UK. She had a lady with her kids come up to her the other day to make a ridiculous complaint. The lady had apparently arrived at the entrance of the park and planned to meet her friend in the car park so they could enter the park together.

Unfortunately, this lady had left her phone at home and had no way of contacting her friend to organise where exactly in the large car park and entrance they were going to meet up. So, the lady approached one of the staff members at the turnstile gates who normally check wristbands, tickets, etc. She asked the staff member if she could get her phone out, go on Facebook, add the friend she wanted to meet up with, and message her on the lady’s behalf as to where they should meet.

Obviously, the staff member refused, explaining she was not allowed to have her phone on her at work, and even if she was, she wouldn’t be okay with doing such a thing. Unsurprisingly, the clueless lady then demanded a superior to complain to about the staff member’s lack of cooperation and helpfulness. The superior taking the complaint was my girlfriend.

We still wonder, a few days later, if she has ever gone up to any other strangers in the past and asked them to add other strangers on Facebook to message them for her.

Didn’t Read The Book On Facebook

I broke my phone, so I made a Facebook post letting my friends and family know that I would not be able to use my phone.

My best friend is pregnant, so she left a message telling me she would call my job when she went into labor so that I could get to the hospital. I replied to message me on Facebook first, and then call my job if I didn’t respond.

My grandma commented right under that, “Can I contact you through Facebook?”

…on Facebook.

Unable To Face Life Without Facebook

(We have a new intern working with us. He has been fine for the past week and has been set up with a computer login to get some involvement with actual estimating. After a couple of hours, he pops this question.)

Intern: “How do you guys work without the Internet?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Intern: “You said I need to use the Internet, but I can’t get on it.”

Me: “You’ve been emailing me, though.”

Intern: “I know, but the Internet won’t work.”

(I go over to his computer and see that he is trying to access Facebook.)

Me: “I see. Facebook is blocked on our network.”

Intern: “You blocked the Internet? How do you get any work done?”

Me: “No, we haven’t blocked the entire Internet. Just Facebook.”

(This confused him so much that he had to lie down. After a week of similar questions, our manager agreed mutually with him that perhaps this office wasn’t the best place for him. He now works on the tools, and seems much happier for it.)

Her Facebook Is Going Down The Toilet (Paper)

(I am usually a cashier, but, in some circumstances when the business is slow, a manager will ask me to put up things that were left behind at registers. I’m busy returning some toiletries to the toilet paper aisle when I see a woman staring indecisively at a package of toilet paper in her hand.)

Woman: “Hmmm.”

(She places the package into her buggy and continues to stare.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, ma’am?”

Woman: “Oh, no! I’m fine.”

(She turns away from me and pulls her cellphone out of her back pocket. Quickly, she snaps a photo of the toilet paper lying in her cart.)

Woman: “Wow, that’s a good picture! I’m going to put it on Facebook.”

(Pleased with herself, she smiled and threw the package back onto the shelf. I, confused, moved along with my returns, shaking my head in disbelief.)

Of course you need attention, Aunty!

This reminds of the only joke I sort-of remember from “The Norm Show”. Norm’s boss has seen some unflattering posts about him on an office computer, possibly from Facebook. Incensed, he demands Norm put “The Internet” in his hand immediately. Norm grabs a 3.5 inch diskette and puts it in his hand… ☺

LOL!

……usually gets contention!!!!

Should be “Craves Attention.”

You don’t have to feel compelled to give it to them.

This reminds me. It’s that time of the year to look at my Facebook Page again.

I changed my facebook status to “deleted” several years ago.

I never started Facebook. I figured I didn’t give a hoot what other people were doing since I could talk to them in person. One friend suggested that they do Facebook because they like their family.